Archive for December, 2006
Sunday Prayer

Heavenly Father,
We humbly sing Your praises
For hanging Saddam Hussein
And sending him back to Hell where he belongs
We thank You for guiding the hand of President Bush
In showing the Iraqi people the way to freedom and democracy
And the wisdom in publically executing those who stand in the way of those goals
We humbly beseech you to send Saddam to the worst part of Hell
Where his flesh will be burned, pierced, carved, stabbed and singed
And then be dipped in lemon juice before a bath in boiling hot lava
We hope each of his teeth will be extracted one by one
And his fingernails and toenails be pulled out
We know that in Your love and mercy You’ll spare no expense
To drive home the point
That you can run but you cannot hide
From the United States of America
Amen
20 commentsRot In Hell, Saddam
Q: What’s Saddam Hussein doing before New Year’s Eve?
A: Nothing. Just hanging around.
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Oops!? He can’t claim he’s “president” no more!
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I hope it’s clear to every single towelhead in towelheadland that when the United States of America says it’s gonna doing something then it’s as good as done.? AND we’re gonna get done PDQ.? A little more than three and a half years after we liberated Iraq from the evil oppression of a piece of scum that would make a cockroach throw up, the United States of America made sure that scum got flushed down the toilet and sent through one of the Iraqi water purification plants repaired through the goodwill of the United States of America.
Here was some great big he-man pushing his weight around just like Hitler tried to do in Europe.? If the United States of America hadn’t stepped up to the plate to take care of this psycho S.O.B the entire Middle East would’ve found itself blackmailed into being Saddam’s butt boy.? And he probably wouldn’t have stopped there!? We already found enough chemical and biological weapons in Iraq (and don’t think we didn’t you whiny, liberals appeasers) to make Joseph Mengele drool.? And that ain’t even thinking about the nuclear bombs he almost built.? Had the United States of America just sat back like the Democ-RATs wanted us to, he would’ve turned that sandpit into a?great big piece of beach glass.
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Thanks to President Bush’s decisive leadership
another nuclear war was averted.
The one thing that Mr. Moustache failed to take into account is the fact that the United States of America HATES a bully.? As soon as some ruffian tries to run roughshod over the people of a country and treat ‘em like slaves, the US of A will not rest until that no-good so and so gets his butt kicked and the oppressed are free to set up their own democracy.? We made good on the promise in spades.?
Thanks to us, Iraqis have their country back and the sweet winds of Freedom blow through the land once again.? We helped them set up a real government and taught them how the justice system oughta work.? I ain’t saying it’s perfect over there.? They still got a lot to learn about how to run a country right.? And they coulda convicted Saddam a lot quicker if their police force kept a tighter grip on protecting some of the prosecutors.? But that’s just nitpicking.? The fact is - he’s dead and (with a little help from you-know-how) they did it themselves.
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A new flag means a new beginning!? Many Iraqi Christians
feel disrepected by the Islam stuff between the stars
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Walking around Boston, Massachusetts today, I wasn’t too surprised to see hundreds of people wearing black arm bands and stumbling around with tears in their eyes.? They lost one of their best friends.? Who’s gonna help ‘em destroy America now???They’re probably already printing t-shirts with “I (heart) Iran” on ‘em.?
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Liberals all over the country will hold candlelight
vigils to honor Saddam
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I wanna add that now is not the time for complaining about the two or three loose ends we gotta tie up.? Now is the time to pat ourselves on the back and take a break with a nice cold Coca Cola.? We done good.? So let’s celebrate!
Q:?What’s Saddam’s least favorite game?
A: Hangman!
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God is Love!
BBN
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I almost forgot…
Friends,
Just as we were about to celebrate the end of another wonderful God-given year, we got a great big reminder that God works in wonderful and mysterious ways. Out of the blue, we got a a phone call from the aide to a very important Republican senator, who might just be running for President. I’m sorry I cannot reveal his name, but what I can revel is that he is prepared to personally take on Shelley’s campaign to get our Lord and personal savior Jesus Christ full American Citizenship, the country he founded.
It just goes to show - you don’t go celebrating until Jesus gives you something to really celebrate about! Please help us share the new-year joy by adding your name to Shelley’s petition.
Speaking of Shelley, we’ve been trying to get the great news to her and Barbra who are currently away at the Jesus Camp, but sadly the phone lines seem to be down. I’m certain that she and the STR Junior Club are having a great time at the camp, but if any of our STR club members are passing near Decorah, Iowa today please feel free to drop-in and pass on the good news.
Yours in Christ,
Tristan J. Shuddery
7 commentsBriefly Patriotic - Hybrid Humans? NO!
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They say that Hell don?t have no bottom and with recent news out of England that appears to be true.? English scientists wanna start making hybrid humans that are part human and part cow!? You heard me right, part human and part cow.? If this don?t go against the word of God then I hope that He strikes me dead right here on the spot and sends me up to Heaven immediately.? Now the liberals will chime in saying ?it?s only .1 percent cow? but that?s .1 too much.? Now I ain?t sure who?s behind this all.? Whether it?s the direct influence of Satan or whether homosexuals wanna find some new thing to have sex with, but the world?s gotta take a stand against it before our babies? first words become ?Moo?.
12 commentsNew Year Notices
Friends,
I know things seem a little quite here at Shelley’s, but I can assure you it’s just the calm before the storm. Great things are happening at STR.com in 2007 and Shelley has kindly allowed me to be the bearer of this good news.
In January, thanks to your donations we are able to launch our new ?Kids on Fire Patriot Camp?, program for young Christians. Shelley and Barbra will be leading a group of fifty of the luckiest little Americans. This camp is for kids who want to get closer to Jesus. We’ll be speaking in tongues and helping turn your children into warriors for Christ. There are three spare places, so please contact us at the usual address if one of your children would like to attend. Priority will go to the families of our corporate donors.

Shelley and Barbra will teach your kids to smash liberalsim, and fight atheism. You could be the leader of a family of Christian Soldiers!
In December we began our partnership with what is probably the best Science site on the Internet, I’m sure you guessed that I’m talking about ?Overwhelming Evidence? the site created by Bill Dembski to keep young people up to date with the latest issues in the Intelligent Design controversy. Bill has personally agreed to let us use some of the best articles published on his site ? we will be featuring these over the next month or so.

I will be delivering the keynote address for the launch of Bill Dembski’s exciting new book; the text that promises to finally smash the Darwin’s sorry looking theory of evolution!
Finally, your generous donations have also funded a replacement for Billy Bob’s Jesus Car. We were all very sad when Satan himself deprived the state of Massachusetts of this four wheeled vehicle of salvation. Thankfully, we have found a suitable vehicle and equipped it with everything Billy is every likely to need to conduct his important ministry.

The STR.com Jesus Car. It’s an exciting multimedia Jesus experience. Sinners beware: Billy Bob is taking Sodomy Central back to God!
With God’s help and your continued prayers, I just know that ShelleyTheRepublican will be instrumental in delivering a Republican victory in 2008.
Yours in Christ,
Tristan J. Shuddery
5 commentsBriefly Patriotic - Pray For Papa Pilgrim
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Papa Pilgrim found Jesus in the 1970?s and soon moved himself and his ever growing family up to Alaska.? All he ever wanted was a piece of land and to love the Lord.? So, he bought a 450 acre plot allowing him to turn his back on a world filled with wickedness and sin and focus on the word of God .? With final tally of fifteen children, he and his wife home schooled them with a bible as their only text.? To keep sin at bay he insisted that his children bathe with their clothes on.? Three years ago this most Godly of men protested the government turning the area around his land into Federal parkland by clearing a 14 mile road through the so-called ?park?.? So I guess it ain?t too surprising that the government now accuses him of 27 counts of rape and incest as payback for being an American and a Christian.? I hope you?ll keep him in your prayers tonight.
22 commentsBriefly Patriotic - A Birthday Prayer

My daughter turned ten today.? I?d like to share the following birthday prayer we before every birthday supper.
12 commentsMerciful Creator, we humbly thank You for sending us [the name of the child] down from Heaven to spend as much time as You see fit on Earth before she?s called back to join Your Heavenly choir.? We hope she understands that she is blessed since she was neither scraped from her sobbing mother?s womb nor had her brains vacuumed from her head.? She, unlike so many other innocent pre-born children, was not killed by ?science?.? We chose not to throw her mangled, lifeless body into a trashcan in some rat infested alleyway but to bring her into this world as one who works to bring the knowledge of Your will to the people of world.? Amen.
Evolution: An idea on the verge of extinction!
Most scientists are starting to realize that the Victorian English doctrine of “Evolution” is well-past it’s use-by date. Every day, thanks to sites like this, scientists are starting to discover that Intelligent Design is the only solution to all of the gaps in evolutionary theory. Scientists are starting to realize that the very concepts upon which the “science” of evolution is based just do not make sense:
For example, consider the phrase “Survival of the fittest”. Die-hard evolutionists propose that this is the “moral force” behind the whole of evolution. But what does it actually mean? Well we all know what “survive means” - it means not becoming extinct, and having the most offspring. If you ask a Darwinist to define “fittest”, you may be surprised to hear exactly the same definition: it means not becoming extinct, and having the most offspring. Could Darwinists have been so silly to have based their entire field of study on a glaringly obvious tautology?

The phrase “survival of the fittest” was coined by the British atheist Herbert Spencer. He is widely held to be the founder of “Social Darwinism”, an evil political force which proposes to undermine the teachings of Jesus.
What if “Survival of the fittest” really were the “engine” that drives life on? Do we really live in a selfish world where only the most ruthless competitors stand a chance of survival? Fortunately this is not the case. When Darwin originally wrote his “Origin of Species” he was completely unaware of the many forms of symbiosis, co-operation and even generosity in the animal kingdom. The only way a Darwinist can continue to believe in this core dogma is by closing his eyes to the last hundred years of biological research.

One of the daily riots that plague the once-great city of Paris, France. A deadly free-for-all in which drug-crazed french-men brawl and try to sodomize each other. Is this what proponents of “Survival of the Fittest” really want?
Unlike Evolutionists, we Proponents of ID do not pretend that we have all the answers. We only wish to humbly point out that scientists who refuse to accept Intelligent Design may be wasting time and risking lives. For example, it is widely acknowledged amongst AIDS researchers that the reason why the virus is so hard to fight is because it “evolves”. Millions of dollars are being spent on researching how this life-form evolves and where has it got us? Nobody has ever observed an AIDS virus in the act of “evolution”, it’s just dogma.
Perhaps the reason for failure of conventional evolutionary research has less to do with “bad luck” or “lack of budget”, but a fundamentally wrong approach. Is it not possible that life cannot evolve in the way that Darwinists think? Evidence suggests that it only adapts in precisely the way predicted by the theory of Intelligent Design?

The deadly AIDS virus. Could it be a warning from the Designer of the Universe to stop believing in the evil of Evolution, and instead study Intelligent Design?
There is much work still to do, but as yet mainstream science has not yet managed to argue away this new science. I think this may be proof that our ideas are valid. All we need to do in order to win this debate is to keep making clear arguments that show the inherent contradictions and absurdities of Darwinism. I believe that ID provides exactly the scientific framework to help simplify the complex problems that continue to puzzle mankind. I personally predict that one or more of the bigger commercial research organisations will come over to our side of the debate within a matter of months: Why wouldn’t they accept the truth when there is so much of their own money at stake!
Thanks to our sister-blog “Overwhelming Evidence” for permission to re-publish this article.
Tristan J. Shuddery
18 commentsBriefly Patriotic - The Day After

Well, y?all made your yearly appearance in church and rushed home to figure out which presents to return.? But presents ain?t the only thing y?all will be returning.? With your consciences filled with the false love for your country and your fellow man, you?ll return to your liberal ways of promoting the welfare state, so called ?equal opportunity?, homosexual rights, the destruction of Israel, electing terrorists to participate in our government, using destructive Yurpeen operating systems and giving every job in the United States of America to a Mexican.? All of this only goes to prove that while you may not be able to teach an old dog new tricks and you can?t teach a liberal anything.
8 commentsTime for common-sense in corporate regulation
Friends,
What is the most discriminated against group in American culture today? If you guessed “African Americans” or “Hispanics” you would be dead wrong. Perhaps you guessed “conservatives”, and while we do suffer a great deal of abuse at the hands of the liberal minority who have seized control of our culture - god has given us conservatives the strength to overcome all difficulties. No, the answer to this question is American Business: There is no segment of society that is more repressed today than our corporations.

Who are the enemies of the corporations that produce our wealth? Communistic and atheistic organistions called unions. They hate America and they do not want you to be wealthy and free.
There once was a time, we might call it a “golden age” of free enterprise when inspirational entrepreneurs were free to set up businesses without fear of regulation and red-tape. Those were America’s greatest days, and we owe it to those great men who built America; the leaders who made America strong. And then from nowhere President Roosevelt, the closest thing we have ever had to a communist leader trashed everything. He instituted a “minimum wage”, and took away everybody’s freedom to earn what they deserve. He invented “social security” and “benefits”, and took away people’s desire to work. But is that enough for the Democrats who will not rest until America is once-again in the grip of communism?

Enron, one of many victims of a liberal anti-corporate conspiracy. Why are liberals unable to let great corporations like Enron get on with the business of making money? All liberals want is bigger government to take away your freedom!
Not a chance: The liberals invented something called the “Sarbanes Oxley Act”, a law that requires all businesses to hopelessly entangle themselves in bureaucracy (a french word) and yet more red tape. Liberals claim that the “Sarbanes Oxley Act” will help keep companies acting within the law, however we conservatives know that it will force American companies into bankruptcy.
“People get to make good decisions or bad decisions. And they get to pay the consequences or to enjoy the fruits of their decisions. That’s the way the system works. Companies come and go. It’s part of the genius of capitalism.” - Treasury Secretary Paul O’Neill
We at STR.com agree with the treasury secretary. So what if people lost money from Enron and other companies: Big boo-hoo, thats just the way capitolism works. Those people lost money because they lacked faith in Jesus. Had they been pure of heart, God would have protected them. That is the first law of finance!
It’s time to return to a common-sense approach to corporate regulation. The liberal heavy-handed approach has gone way too far, and we Americans are suffering. Fortunately the Republican party is helping to dismantle the problems caused by previous governments.Roosevelt’s communism is dead, and soon we will have got rid of his deadly legacy.
Yours in Christ,
Tristan J. Shuddery
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