Ubuntu ? Why It Is Wrong For America
There’s been a real “buzz” about Ubuntu. The ‘techie’ magazines and the nerds who read them have been talking about it like they’d just seen Laura Croft naked. An ‘Ubuntu’, in case you’re normal and haven’t heard, is a form of “operating system”, and the such is it’s popularity that “ubuntu” is now one of the Top 20 searched terms according to the Googler, right up there with ’sodomy’, ‘Britney Spears” and fat America-hater ‘michael moore’.
Clearly this Ubuntu must be pretty vile!
Further investigation shows that the Ubuntu is an especially hateful form of what computer expert Steve Balmer called “The Linux virus”. Foruntately the claims made by the Ubuntu company somewhat over-blow their potential to take-over the world. For example, Ubuntu is based on the outmoded “Debian” Linux distribution which is notoriously difficult to install. Most users who have attempted to install the product have given up in frustration. Those are the lucky ones: Once it is on a PC it is almost impossible to remove. According to a Department of Defence study, the only way to fully eliminate it is to remove and physically destroy your computer’s hard disk.
Research shows Ubuntu is originally from South Africa and was created by a Mark Shuttleworth, a former entrepreneur who made a bazillion dollars through a thing called Capitalism. Having made his money, Mark has decided that nobody else should get rich, and that is why he’s set about de-stabilizing our economy with his Linux software. Because Mark is a born-again commie (the worst kind) he gives Ubuntu away for free to everyone: free, free, free! But don’t ask Mark for any money, he won’t give you any of that. He will only give you a stupid Ubuntu disk. The money he keeps!
This poor creature is being tortured by the Ubuntu testing team: They want to know if it will have the same harmful effect on beasts as it does on humans. The answer: Yes
Ubuntu (from the Swahili term meaning ?We will rape your children?) is the very opposite of Redmond, WA’s awesome Vista Home Server operating systems. For example, Vista includes powerful blogging tools such as notepad.exe, which I sued to write this article. Last time I checked, Linix contained no equivalent of this versatile tool. While Vista is a slick, professional and scalable OS, Ubuntu is only kept ‘free’ by the judicious use of cheap, South African labor, often using intimidation, threats, and even outright violence to keep workers in line, slavishly marching towards the Ubuntu Management team’s brutal deadlines.
Employee relations have never been worse at Ubuntu Co. Would you want to use software developed under conditions like this? Those of us who wish to make a moral stand should reject this criminal software.
When Ubuntu has so little going for it, it should come as no surprise that the sales team will stop at nothing to excessively hype and lie about the Ubuntu product to get it into your kids’ hands. Just look at the latest marketing campaign: it’s nothing but mixed-race pornography! That the previous advertising campaign had nothing but filthy black Rap music and swear-words should come as no surprise. What next, Ubuntu on pink CDs? Ubuntu with an arabic ‘halal’ symbol?
A recent advertising campaign for Ubuntu Linux: This explicitly sexual message is as much an advert for inter-racial fornication as it is for a computer program. Would Microsoft have considered this acceptable? Surely not.
As I have previously mentioned, the installation routine is a joke: The preferred method of installation is via CD, which is ironic given that Ubuntu do not physically distribute CDs themselves, relying on a network of pirats, criminal hackers and scofflaws called “bittorrent” to do their dirty work for them. Obtaining the CD “image file”, requires the user to descend into a cess-pit of piracy sites where these disk-images are offered alongside explicit pornography and instruction manuals for manufacturing WMDs. By comparison, Microsoft’s excellent Vista is shipped on reliable CDs in an attractive plastic box, or more usually pre-installed on your Vista ready computer. Now tell me, which company has the most sensible distribution model?
Having installed the files, the Ubuntards had saved the worst for last: It’s network installation was preposterous, requiring me to input all manner of numbers called “IP Addresses”. These are silly dotted numbers like 10.1.1.256.432. Why should any of this be required to use the Internet? Once again, Microsoft has the right idea - they include all the numbers you need on the installation CD.
Ubuntu’s text-based login-screen seems woefully inadequate compared to the gleaming sophistication of Vista Home Server. This is perhaps the main reason why Ubuntu is not yet ready for the desktop.
What level of technical support do you expect for this “free” product? The Ubuntu network operations center, the technical nerve-center of the Ubuntu support team, is just a phone queue to nowhere. Ubuntu (from the Mandinga tribal language meaning ?We will violate your hot blonde cheerleaders?) even dares to suggest this “cost saving” of having no tech support is being passed on to you!
An actual photo of the Ubuntu help-desk. Notice that there is no real person working there. If you get stuck with Ubuntu then you are on your own. Windows on the other hand provides a collection of attractive animation characters including the popular “Clippy” who can troubleshoot any kind of problem without making a call.
You really need to ask yourself some fundamental things about Ubuntu: if it’s so free, why does it cost so much time and effort to install? Ubuntu is made by afro-hippy communists who work under slave labor conditions. And being from South Africa they would love nothing more then to undermine America, because they are jealous of the freedoms people have here. Freedom is never free, and neither is this horrible Ubuntu OS!
America is a great land, filled with wide open pastures, where cattle graze endless pasture and majestic eagles soar. Here you can enjoy the incredible benefits brought about by living in the greatest land ever known to mankind. You can eat tasty cheeseburgers, and thanks to hard-working American innovators, you can buy all the cheeseburgers you can eat for under ten dollars. I do not think the South-Africans would be so jealous if they had all the great things we take for granted.
Entrepreneurship and hard work are what made America what it is today. Just look at Bill Gates! Don’t let Ubuntu talk you into this nonsense about things being free, the best thing for everyone is business competition. That’s just back-door communism. Once your computer software becomes free what next? Free health care? Free bourbon for the unemployed? Free money? Lets not get onto the slippery slope of hand-out dependancy.
I’ve got an idea: Ubuntu (from the Soweto township slang meaning ?Your white women say they don’t…. but they do?) should be used as an insult such as: ?kick him in the ubuntu? or ?what a stupid ubuntu you dumb ubuntu? or ?if you ever come back here I will ubuntu your ubuntu… ubuntu?. Only when people revile the word Ubuntu, will people finally understand the danger it poses.
Ubuntu? Ubuntu to you!
“Always Right”
Charles ?Chuck? Roast III
43 Comments so far
Leave a reply
Loading ...
Why are you talking about operating systems on a religious website. Are you that crazy in the US. That why you reelected bush. You should all of you fags burn in hell. Your website is running on a Linux host stupid. When you don’t know what your talking about… shut the fuck up…
Your entire country is falling apart because of people like you.
Again… burn motherfuckers… burn.
Viva Linux… Viva Ubuntu…
Si il y a seulement une personne qui prend le contenu de cet article au s?ɬ©rieux, il doit r?ɬ©ellement aller consulter un psy…
“You should all of you fags burn in hell.”
Not helping.
Just thought I’d let everybody know, as of yesterday I’m running Ubuntu Gutsy with Compiz Fusion… still getting it all setup the way I want it but so far it’s been a pleasure to work with. It’s a tad tricky in some ways, I’m not used to having to practically write code to install something O_o, but I prefer it over Vista.
So far, so good,
-Wraith
I’m currently running Kubuntu (better for Windows users) with Firefox, all completely free.
Good grief, Troy, can’t you go one day without talking about “twoofers”? If you hate the “twoofers” so much, STOP TALKING ABOUT THEM!
And what does Alex Jones have to do with Ubuntu? NOTHING!
Good old Troy Sexton……..he’s still slick as an oil spill.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HOt5U8MY77Y
I’ve been a windows user since my early childhood. I’m used to it and its alright. Although because of all the problems I’ve had with vista I decided to switch to Ubuntu. On this computer it runs fast, VERY EASY TO INSTALL!, It has open office which is exactly like MSoffice but free and you can save in your .doc files. You cannot find a simplifier Operating System to run period.
Heres a typical problem I used to have.
Windows: Okay downloaded a movie file.. Double click… wait… it can’t play the extension… okay download another movie player that can play the extension.
Ubuntu: Okay downloaded a movie file… double click… popup “You cannot currently play this extension would you like to download codec?”
This is SO user friendly. They have tech support on forums, IRC, Answer/launchpad, mailing lists, public documentation.
Its a shame that people write articles like these for a great program such as Ubuntu. If you want to see a bad program trying to take over the world its “dramatic pause” MS WINDOWS! People open your eyes and try out this program! You can download and burn onto a cd, run it and try it out without any installation! If you like it…then install it… if you don’t then use windows.
Don’t let writers like this put down Ubuntu.. Try it out for yourself!
http://www.ubuntu.com/
mYl1ttl3PWNY, excellent post!
I’ve been using Ubuntu since early 2006 when I tried out Ubuntu 5.10 Breezy Badger. I really didn’t care for Ubuntu until Ubuntu 6.06 Dapper Drake came out, and I’ve stuck with Ubuntu ever since. I’m now using Ubuntu 7.04 Feisty Fawn. For some reason, Ubuntu 7.10 doesn’t like either of my computers, so I’ve decided to stick with Ubuntu 7.04. If it’s a bug in Ubuntu 7.10 causing it to crash on my computers (Ubuntu 7.10 crashes on my aunt’s computer as well), then I will either wait for a bug fix or wait until Ubuntu 8.04 LTS Hardy Heron comes out.
“Windows: Okay downloaded a movie file.. Double click?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ wait?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ it can?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t play the extension?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ okay download another movie player that can play the extension.”
Uhm, there is a handy dandy little codec pack by the name of CCCP (Combined Community Codec Pack) that can play *any* media file known.
Nice to see Ubuntu has a 3 ass limit to their ads…
There happens to be this particular form of irony called sarcasm. It is typically encountered when people interact with each other. While typically seen when people meet each other face-to-face, it is possible for sarcasm to be effectively transmitted via the internet. Such irony can occur anywhere on the internet, including on blogs. Like this blog. Like this article. Like this article about Ubuntu. For the not-too-quick ones, that means this article was sarcasm. That means you don’t take it seriously. For those still struggling along, that means that, for instance, the author is aware that the word “Ubuntu” does not mean “We will rape your children”. For everyone that posted a “correction” to the article but maintains that they knew it was sarcastic, congratulations, you managed to get the point and still look like and idiot. In all seriousness, however, get off your computers and go meet some real people. Basic human interaction may be incredibly scary, but you can do it, I have faith in you. Here, I’ll even give you a Wikipedia article so you can recognize sarcasm in your endeavors:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarcasm
Quick quiz: Can you spot my sarcasm? I’ll give you a hint: It is close. Very close.
Anybody who uses Ubuntu is with al-Qaeda. After escaping Afghanistan, Osama bin Laden got a face lift, a haircut, and a shave and moved to South Africa and adopted the name Mark Shuttleworth. Therefore, Ubuntu is a front for al-Qaeda. Every time you buy a Dell computer with pre-installed Ubuntu, part of the proceeds goes to al-Qaeda. So if you use Ubuntu or a buy a Dell computer with pre-installed Ubuntu, you fund al-Qaeda. Anybody who uses Ubuntu is a terrorist and deserves to put in Gitmo.
And Osama bin Laden is a Bioroidic Cyborg maked by CIA. Al Qaeda mainframe is called “Skynet”. Ubuntu is a front of some “Matrix” project. The real name of Troy Sexton is Sarah connors. BUT, SUDDENLY, USA IS A SECOND WORLD COUNTRY!!! Oh sh*t! Now we got to use Ubuntu for the rest of our lives!
LOL. Enjoy your deficit.
http://www.shelleytherepublican.com/2007/08/18/ubuntu-%e2%8#0%93-why-it-is-wrong-for-america.aspx#comment-95430
“?ǬøDe verdad en EE.UU estais todos tan locos?”
Est?ɬ°n mas locos que una cabra, cuando beb?ɬ©s les daban diluyente en vez de leche, se contradicen en todo lo que dicen y no se dan cuenta, por eso son tan divertidos.
“And Osama bin Laden is a Bioroidic Cyborg maked by CIA. Al Qaeda mainframe is called ?¢‚Ǩ?ìSkynet?¢‚Ǩ¬ù. Ubuntu is a front of some ?¢‚Ǩ?ìMatrix?¢‚Ǩ¬ù project. The real name of Troy Sexton is Sarah connors. BUT, SUDDENLY, USA IS A SECOND WORLD COUNTRY!!! Oh sh*t! Now we got to use Ubuntu for the rest of our lives!
LOL. Enjoy your deficit.”
Lulz, two words, that’s awesome.
you can’t really believe this bull can you? if this is how you see things, then by all means please give up all your hard earned money now for bill gates needs it for his shitty software.
you and windows deserve one another. i for one have used 9 different flavos of windows, and hatted all of them. i have but one ubuntu and i love it
Wow, I mean there is no other word to describe all this bull shit ! WOW.
Charles, you’re a dumbass. go back to kinderarten! http://www.ubuntu.com/ this is really ubuntu, and it’s not evil nor is it satanist in any way. And, it’s FREE. That means you actually don’t have to pay for crappy code such as windows which crashes all the time.
God hates the closed-mind persons, you are like the catholic inquisition, and you call yourself Christians, that’s not how the real Master Jesus thinks!!
asshole, close this crap
wow this is the biggest bs i’ve ever seen, took me about 30 minutes and my ubuntu can do everything i could on windows and more. you want a few screenshots? I would say i am a good Christian and i make sure i’m not tempting myself with satanic things. this is not anywhere near satanic it’s like you just wrote this article just because you had nothing to write about. none of the stuff in this article is true. Ubuntu is very user friendly and if you are a programmer like me it has all the features you want. Ubuntu has a beautiful GUI and the login screen does not look like that unless you boot ubuntu on purpose without running X (Graphics). all of these things that you say are “ads for ubuntu” are not even the official ads of ubuntu. they do not advertise torturing creatures or porn or any of that. All of the software is free because they do not want african people with as little money as they have to have to pay for software. if you ask me you are being very racist. And don’t even get me started on Windows Vista. i just bought a new laptop ($2000), and on the second day of having it the system crashes and won’t boot up again. so then i switched that computer to ubuntu (knowing that it works amazing from using it on my desktop for a few years). It’s funny how you call yourself a Christian and yet you make up all these lies, and for what reason? who knows, you probably just wanted a new story to put up, so you make up one just by taking people (non-ubuntu team’s) created fake ubuntu ads and write a story about ubuntu without even researching it or trying it out yourself. want a few screenshots of how slick the ubuntu x-interface is?
“cover flow” like affect for open windows using compiz-fuzion
“dashboard” like affect using compiz widget-layer
Now tell me ubuntu looks like s@#$ and is an atheist program for “al queada and osama bin laden”. gosh
I’m all for the government and Microsoft using false-flag cyberattacks on the internet and banking systems and claiming that the offending computers were running Linux so we can officially declare Linux to be a terrorist tool and round up all Linux users and put them in prison for life.
In response to the fallen demon in #11’s comment, that linux will run on anything, I’d like to brag that I got ubuntu running on a piece of buttered toast. For you bloated, cheeseburger eating, slanderous, “i’m watching my cholesterol” republicans who can’t have another milligram of synthetic fat, it also works on dried toast. For my liberal friends, I’d like to note that it runs better with apricot spread and a quick pinch of mary jane.
INDEPENDENT FOREVER! YOU CAN’T BUY THIS UNDECIDED!
-Dan Waggoner, Independent, like how Pluto revolves around the sun, but it isn’t a planet. I’m independent, and thus immune to the cancerous effects of Shelly the Ruplican being read while watching Fox News.
PS Fuck Rupert Murdoch
Is incredible to see how many people can be fooled by their own level of ignorance and arrogance, but is real jejeje.
I am a user of PC operating systems since DOS 1.1, suffering all the windows transitions, and seeing good OS like OS2 of IBM, be tainted by the Bill Gates diminishing marketing approach, i have seen so many good software be scratched from the market just because people again by ignorance, wanted i think to be fooled and robbed by Microsoft, with all their half finished programs.
How many times are we going to pay Microsoft for the same things -unfinished programs full of bugs-??? Now that XP is really mature and stable, they come out with another scam.
Do i have to change my machine because MS Vista can not run on it? Why am i forced to spend that money?
I have tested a couple of linux distros like ubuntu, kubuntu, mandriva and open Suse, and depending of the kind of user you are one will be more suitable than other.
By the way i am not against USA, i am Christian and i am not communist.
“INDEPENDENT FOREVER! YOU CAN?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢T BUY THIS UNDECIDED!”
Personally I thought you attack was a little crude, but I’m also independant XD. Die political parties and make up your own damn mind is my thoughts.
@A.J.Monegro, okay in all honesty , you have to admit that 98 SE, 2000, and XP where damned good systems. 98 SE pioneered many of the features we find normally in all OS’s, and was for the most part the only reasonable stable release of the 9x kernel and system build. 2000 Pro brought NT power to home users (those of us lucky enough to get our hands on it) and really showed what MS can do with they put their minds to it. XP was a solid more user firendly and home ready version of 2000, increasing on it’s now growing compatibility despite it’s predicessor NT 4’s reluctance to run *anything*. I haven’t found Vista to be as bad as everyone who shouts “fuck vista” say. The only system I find true hate justified for is ME, I could walk by that thing and it would BSOD. Vista is unfairly compared to ME, the biggest flop since the Ford Ebsil.
Once Ive tried Ubuntu Linux. And Ive noticed it woulnt work the way I wanted to. So I reverted back to debian. And I know manny linux newbs using ubuntu. And I teach them allot of using Linux. But after reading this I will send them this link.
Thanks.
Haha, you’re so stupid if you belive this.
Ubuntu really means “we are people because of other people”.
You sucks!!!
I’ve never laugth so much as today!
I can not believe who wrote this article. I am typing this with a Linux system.
You bible stompers are so gullible and stupid. Your stupidity knows no bounds ! Go back to Oral Roberts computer classes and tell them they all are a bunch ignorant idiots.
I got a good laugh, DOS fonts, a Monkey with a Microsoft Keyboard an Apple Computer, the girls with the asses the old pic from the 60s before the human rights movement.
You should work as a Lexus salesman.
FUCK YOU ALL UBUNTU IS THE ONLY THING RIGHT IN A COMPUTER FUCK WINDOWS AND ALL THAT IS ON IT
Woah, you tried to use the network install? Didn’t you read the guide? That particular technology is only for people who really know what they’re doing with Linux-based systems, and have a custom image built up so they can deploy it across a large set of computers in minimal time. I’ve not used Windows in a few years (Ubuntu interestingly hasn’t been that hard for me to use, but then again, I’m someone who felt more comfortable back when computers took up rooms and were used almost exclusively to solve serious problems–like the deployment of nuclear weapons), but I’m fairly certain that there is no comparative feature.
Also, I feel obliged to point out that the picture of the women’s unclad buttocks is fairly old: it’s been floating around the Internet now for about three and a half years, when it was jokingly suggested by an Ubuntu user as the operating system’s new flash screen. I guess the project will never live down the ubuntu-calendar package.
Try this… so funny…
http://www.shelleytherepublican.com/phpinfo.php
Stupid win-tard!!!!
Computer is only a tool.. And i choose linux to be installed in it.
What does we do with the computer thats matter.
choosing between Windows or Linux is like trying to chose between 5/8 and half inch bolts for [insert project name]. They’ll both get the job done.
Your methods to show your ?¢‚Ǩ?ìfacts?¢‚Ǩ¬ù were used by the Nazis in germany during 1930 - 45
Excellent use of Godwins Rule sirrah!
Also, it’s funny that these Jesus Camp folks on this site can even work a computer. I mean come on guys, they sure as hell aren’t smart enough to register to vote, and they don’t have anywhere near a proper command of the English language, so I’ve got to show some respect that they can understand anything about technology. So, for my Red (funny that the colour of the Republican Party is red, and they hate Communists…) friends, bon chance avec votre travaillez contre linux!
?ɂǨ demain
Great article! I particularly like the picture of the three ladies collectively defecating Jesus - good wholesome Christian fun!
Man, I have never seen such cheap crap in my life. The only good place to comment is the black list. Get a life STR freaks! Neo COns have no place.
[...] more facts about Ubuntu Linux, please read the article entitled “Ubuntu: Why it is wrong for America” by STR’s lead technology contributor Charles Roast. This was the very first article to [...]
Ubuntu isn’t the only distribution of Linux. And guess what most of the internet servers are running? I’ll give you a hint..it’s not a Windows or Mac OS version.
http://distrowatch.com/
Dave:
“I think you?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢ll find Ubuntu means ?¢‚ǨÀúHumanity towards others?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢ in Afrikaans.
Mark Shuttleworth is a South African entrepraneur but the company responsible for Ubuntu, Cannonical Ltd., is registered in Douglas, Isle of Man (if you even have a clue where that is) with an operational HQ in London.
Yes, Debian is a pain in the arse to install, so it?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s a good thing you DON?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢T have to install Debian - the Ubuntu installer is a stand-alone program that takes about 30 minutes of wathing TV and drinking tea to install.
I know this site is a long running joke, but no doubt there are people who take it seriously.”
I think this posting is such a big joke and I hope everyone else does too!
Ubuntu is no where as bad as this author claims it to be not that I am an Ubuntu freak or anything but really!
All those pics at the top, what a joke! LOL!
Wanker:
“Great article! I particularly like the picture of the three ladies collectively defecating Jesus - good wholesome Christian fun!”
Just blasphemous!!
I am still laughing …
I’ll tell you this, if this post is a joke, its some great homour, if it isn’t, then I still just can’t stop laughing at your ignorance…
Apparently I am a pirate and a criminal hacker who exploits African people by using and promoting Ubuntu…lolololol
What world are you living in?
Afro-hippy communists? lolol
Maybe this is unknown to you but Linux is used by businesses, governments, schools, organizations,…
Maybe this is unknown to you but the reasons why GNU/Linux exist are to promote freedom and have nothing to do with political parties or religion.
Maybe you are one of those people who don’t think access to technology and information should be available to everyone. If so, I got news for you, the medieval age ended long ago.
Or maybe you just have a great sense of humour.
“Maybe this is unknown to you but Linux is used by businesses, governments, schools, organizations,?¢‚Ǩ¬¶”
No.
“Maybe this is unknown to you but the reasons why GNU/Linux exist are to promote freedom and have nothing to do with political parties or religion.”
No.
Always Right
?¢‚Ǩ?ìMaybe this is unknown to you but Linux is used by businesses, governments, schools, organizations,?¢‚Ǩ¬¶?¢‚Ǩ¬ù
No.”
Well my school used it, half the busnisses I work for use it, those servers have much fewer issues than the Windows Servers have, I’d be happy to let you talk to some IT guys who could tell you.
?¢‚Ǩ?ìMaybe this is unknown to you but the reasons why GNU/Linux exist are to promote freedom and have nothing to do with political parties or religion.?¢‚Ǩ¬ù
No.”
How do you figure “no”.
I couldn’t understand some parts of this article , but I guess I just need to check some more resources regarding this, because it sounds interesting.
Ubuntu is great!
M$ sucks!
U$A Sucks!
I read some comments and I must ask why some ppl are not familiarized with the term irony? This is one of the best Ubuntu endorse I eve read.