A Gift That Means Something
Christmas is a time to be thankful for everything that God gave us.? Thankful for this greatest nation on God?s green earth.? Thankful for a Commander in Chief that ain?t afraid to fight an unknown enemy on an invisible battlefield.? Thankful that he don?t listen to polls or pundits but stays true to God?s instructions.? We?re thankful for an economy that ain?t never gonna slow down.? We?re thankful for wives who know how to be helpers and kids that know when they oughta shut up and show some respect.
Proverbs 13:24 - “He who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.”? Is it
any wonder why our jails are packed with the spoiled
off-spring of ex-hippies and homos?
But mostly we?re thankful to God for sending down His only son to be killed by the Jews so that we could have everlasting life.
Given that far too many of the folks that read our Christian blog ain?t Christians themselves but homos, witches, Catholics and Mormons it probably ain?t a bad idea to remind y?all of what Christmas is ? the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and without him the world would be one great big San Francisco full of towelheads having gay sex right in front of your kids and grandparents.
Where would we be without the morals we have
because of Jesus?? It would be than a never-ending
Folsom Street Fair except everybody would have
to bow down to Mecca before they got sodomized.
It’s pretty obvious that the Jews that run business in America came up with a plan to subvert Christmas by cheapening its meaning with a lot of junk that ain’t got nothing to with God, Jesus or morality of any kind.? From Tickle Me Elmo to red and green flavored condoms given out by the ACLU to your kindergartner very few people buying presents even stop to think about what Jesus wants us to give for Christmas.? Even Michael Moore knows that Jesus would weep at the sight of a dental dam with the words “Happy Swallow-Days” printed on it.
Now we’re planning on putting out a holiday buying guide but this one product caught my eye and after praying, Jesus told me, “yes, Billy Bob, y’all gotta put that up ASAP.”? And you don’t say no to Jesus especially around his birthday.
So here’s the Unborn Baby - US Troop Model ornament
?
Like my pastor says all the time - children are the soldiers of the future.? The killing of pre-borns affects almost every aspect of our life from the health of Social Security to maintaining America’s infrastructure to keeping the price of gasoline affordable, but most of all we need to save our pre-borns because them towelheads breed like rabbits and it’s gonna be up to future generations of Americans to continue to fight in the glorious War on Terror.
This little guy encased in a womb of durable yet attractive plastic is already loaded for bear and y’all just know that his momma’s swelling not only with this future G.I. Joe inside her but also with American pride!? I ain’t ashamed to say that when I first came across this lil fella my eyes filled with the tears of a patriot.? As a matter of fact, I wating to see if there’s some kinda bulk discount so I can not only give ‘em out to everyone I know but also cover my whole tree with ‘em!? Ain’t the kids gonna love seeing that!
And God will, too!
God is Love!
BBN
www.billybobneck.com
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WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT ADVOCATING CHILD ABUSE!!! I WILL THREATEN LEGAL ACTION IF YOU CONTINUE THIS!!! STR’s “Legal team” *will* crumble under me, I promise it. I’m nothing to laugh at like that guys who was threatening to hack you, I will not rest if this continues. Satire or not, one more time STR, one more time. Normally I couldn’t care what you guys say on here, but this I WILL NOT stand for. Do I make myself clear?
Huh…that ornament looks like a modified Mardis Gras king-cake baby…interesting design, I’ll give it that. Doesn’t particularly tickle my fancy, though.
Praise Jesus! I had been feeling rather down this Christmas season with the liberals and homos and lezbos and vegetarians slowly bringing down this once great country into the pits of Hell but as long as there are Christian brothers and sisters to come up with blessed ideas like this I feel reborn with the everlasting glory and spirit of Jesus Christ. I guarantee that at least a half dozen of those ornaments will be decorating the Hunsaker tree this Christmas and I am going to order another dozen or two to give as gifts to my closest friends. Once again this site has lifted my spirits and made me prouder than ever to be an American, a Christian, a Republican and a white man! Praise Jesus! Praise Jesus!
Sedgewick Hunsaker
Fact is that a good old spanking is forming character and makes children obedient to God and parents.
Just compare the youth of 1950 with the youth today. When was more spanking involved you think? Yeah right.. I rest my case.
Shelley
“God?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s green earth.”
It won’t be green for long at the rate the planet’s burning fossil fuels.
“Proverbs 13:24 - ?¢‚Ǩ?ìHe who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.?¢‚Ǩ¬ù Is it
any wonder why our jails are packed with the spoiled
off-spring of ex-hippies and homos?”
Advocating child abuse is not cool to say the least, I would go ape-shit, but Link beat me to it (no hard feelings mate).
“But mostly we?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢re thankful to God for sending down His only son to be killed by the Jews so that we could have everlasting life.”
Makes perfect sense, someone dying makes us immortal (which is a lie, seeing as everyone dies)
“homos, witches, Catholics and Mormons”
Typical medieval approach to things, the reason why PROPER christians don’t come on here is because this site is against everything that God’s word stands for (Peace, loving everyone on the planet, treating others well).
“without him the world would be one great big San Francisco full of towelheads having gay sex right in front of your kids and grandparents.”
No, the world just wouldn’t have the christian religion.
“It?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s pretty obvious that the Jews that run business in America came up with a plan to subvert Christmas by cheapening its meaning with a lot of junk that ain?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t got nothing to with God, Jesus or morality of any kind.”
I smell nazis… And who gives a damn if toys don’t have a little cross on it? Except for you paraniod nutcases.
“So here?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s the Unborn Baby - US Troop Model ornament”
Nice photoshop jerkoff.
children are the soldiers of the future.
“God?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s green earth.”
It won’t be green for long at the rate the planet’s burning fossil fuels.
“Proverbs 13:24 - ?¢‚Ǩ?ìHe who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.?¢‚Ǩ¬ù Is it
any wonder why our jails are packed with the spoiled
off-spring of ex-hippies and homos?”
Advocating child abuse is not cool to say the least, I would go ape-shit, but Link beat me to it (no hard feelings mate).
“But mostly we?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢re thankful to God for sending down His only son to be killed by the Jews so that we could have everlasting life.”
Makes perfect sense, someone dying makes us immortal (which is a lie, seeing as everyone dies)
“homos, witches, Catholics and Mormons”
Typical medieval approach to things, the reason why PROPER christians don’t come on here is because this site is against everything that God’s word stands for (Peace, loving everyone on the planet, treating others well).
“without him the world would be one great big San Francisco full of towelheads having gay sex right in front of your kids and grandparents.”
No, the world just wouldn’t have the christian religion.
“It?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s pretty obvious that the Jews that run business in America came up with a plan to subvert Christmas by cheapening its meaning with a lot of junk that ain?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t got nothing to with God, Jesus or morality of any kind.”
I smell nazis… And who gives a damn if toys don’t have a little cross on it? Except for you paraniod nutcases.
“So here?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s the Unborn Baby - US Troop Model ornament”
Nice photoshop jerkoff.
“children are the soldiers of the future.”
Ofcourse you militiant hillbillies have to take everything back to war.
“it?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s gonna be up to future generations of Americans to continue to fight in the glorious War on Terror.”
Glorious?! Glorious?! The death of thousands of people is what you sick assholes consider glorious?!
So you want to save babies, so they an go and kill someone later in their life
You have never read the bible
You redneck Nazis have nothing to do with God, Jesus or morality of any kind.
PS why the hate towards Catholics. They are better than baptists by a long shot.
The baptist Faith was invented as an excuse to take a dip in the baptismal font during the hot days of the south.
http://www.misspoppy.com/catalog/xcart/customer/product.php?productid=16369&cat=313&page=2
I wish you owned this Shelley!
http://www.misspoppy.com/catalog/xcart/customer/product.php?productid=16357&cat=313&page=3
Or this one…are you going to blacklist the site now?
http://www.misspoppy.com/catalog/xcart/customer/product.php?productid=16402&cat=326&page=1
Ahhh … Too perfect!
@Brit
The last one especially, was very funny, and sooo true :o)
I think it?Ǭ¥s about time i brougt back the good old GWB quotes :o)
“We’re going to — we’ll be sending a person on the ground there pretty soon to help implement the malaria initiative, and that initiative will mean spreading nets and insecticides throughout the country so that we can see a reduction in death of young children that — a death that we can cure.” –George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Oct. 18, 2007
“All I can tell you is when the governor calls, I answer his phone.” –George W. Bush, San Diego, Calif., Oct. 25, 2007
“I fully understand those who say you can’t win this thing militarily. That’s exactly what the United States military says, that you can’t win this military.” –George W. Bush, on the need for political progress in Iraq, Washington, D.C., Oct. 17, 2007
“You know, when you give a man more money in his pocket — in this case, a woman more money in her pocket to expand a business, it — they build new buildings. And when somebody builds a new building somebody has got to come and build the building. And when the building expanded it prevented additional opportunities for people to work.” –George W. Bush, Lancaster, Pa., Oct. 3, 2007
“I heard somebody say, ‘Where’s (Nelson) Mandela?’ Well, Mandela’s dead. Because Saddam killed all the Mandelas.” –George W. Bush, on the former South African president, who is still very much alive, Washington, D.C., Sept. 20, 2007
“As John Howard accurately noted when he went to thank the Austrian troops there last year…” –George W. Bush, referring to Australian troops as “Austrian troops,” APEC Business Summit, Sept. 7, 2007
“I’m going to try to see if I can remember as much to make it sound like I’m smart on the subject.” –George W. Bush, answering a question about a possible flu pandemic, Cleveland, July 10, 2007
“My relationship with this good man is where I’ve been focused, and that’s where my concentration is. And I don’t regret any other aspect of it. And so I — we filled a lot of space together.” –George W. Bush, on British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Washington, D.C., May 17, 2007
Isn?Ǭ¥t he just the biggest no brainer in human history :o)
/True Christian
Why those Jewish and/or Jesus killer lovers come to this most Godly of sources of information in our great nation is beyind me. Aren’t they too busy making sure it is the right of any homo or fag to sodomise our children against Gods wishes. The very fact that they can comment on this great and informative space is an affront to our very being.
Shelly, can’t you please be a damn in this torrent against our morality?
Jesus is Love
“Fact is that a good old spanking is forming character and makes children obedient to God and parents.
Just compare the youth of 1950 with the youth today. When was more spanking involved you think? Yeah right.. I rest my case.
Shelley”
Yeah, the youth of the 50’s (the ones that where spanked) where the ones that became the hippies of the 60’s. I rest my case.
“Yeah, the youth of the 50?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s (the ones that where spanked) where the ones that became the hippies of the 60?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s. I rest my case.”
FAIL, STR. Care to try again?
“It?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s pretty obvious that the Jews that run business in America came up with a plan to subvert Christmas by cheapening its meaning with a lot of junk that ain?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t got nothing to with God, Jesus or morality of any kind.”
See? SEE?! Wal-Mart = BAAAD!
“Like my pastor says all the time - children are the soldiers of the future.”
Worst. Recruitment gimmick. Ever.
“Nice photoshop jerkoff.”
Unfortunately, I believe it’s an actual product.
Maybe it’s a metaphor for Dubya’s legacy…
Are you people just plain fucking CRAZY???? Help us if any of you come into power, wait, Bush is for now, the wingnut.
This has to be some of the funniest satire out there; I mean did the Onion have so many writers that they were able to start this Colbertesqe site?!?! This shit can’t be for real! Shelly you’ve put together an excellent online charachter; “Hey I’m Shelly, I look like Janeane Garofalo, but I don’t act like that liberal carpet muncher! No no God has delivered me to the earth via immaculate conception to spread the good word! Now everybody park yourself in front of your devil box and drink the grape Kool Aid…but make sure it’s no name brand, because the Kool Aid Man was a fag!” Honestly nobody on this earth is fucking dumb enough to believe 1/1,000,00 of the shit that’s on this site! If there was a God, he would have put his/her foot so far up your cunt that you would taste the shit from his sandal for all eternity! Thanks for the funny!
CHILD ABUSE AND RAPE,
SPANKS AND SEX FOR UNDERAGE GIRLS,
GOD BLESS AMERICA!
Fact is that a good old spanking is forming TRAUMAS and makes children COWARDS or VIOLENTS.
@True Christian
HAHAHA! Awww thanks those were great!
http://www.misspoppy.com/catalog/xcart/customer/product.php?productid=16369&cat=313&page=2
RIGHT.
ROFLMAOASTC
President Don Quixote fights unknown enemies on invisible battlefields! The “Boys in the Sand” have gay sex in front of Allah and everybody! “We’re thankful for an economy that ain’t ever gonna slow down.” Yeah,won’t slow down its rapid downward spiral towards the worst collapse in world history! And jails are filled with the spoiled children of gays! We all “know” how gays breed like rabbits! Hilarious! @Link, You’re going to bring legal action against STR for joking about spanking? Good luck with that! Spanking caused hippies? Did spanking cause metalheads, punkers,goths,emos,ravers and rappers too? What does not spanking cause? Rednecks, Republican warhawks,neocons and the Religious Right? LOL Is a light spanking of your wife in bed a mild form of spousal abuse? LOL Will I face legal action for joking about the subject of spanking too? Will I be punished with a spanking or be punished by being denied one? ROFLMAO Who says the politically correct are unfunny? You guys are a regular laugh riot!