STR : THE FREEDOM BLOG

Friends,

You might have noticed that my posts have been rather infrequent - the truth is I’ve been giving virtually every spare moment I have to the McCain campaign: We owe it to Jesus to help the Republican party any way we can! We must guarantee another four years of Republican government. And between you and me, when John McCain gets elected I’ve been promised an important role as the new Presidential Data-retention advisor!

As STR’s senior technology correspondent I’m often asked why it is that the open-source freetards have failed to catch-up with even ten-year old mainstream technology such as Windows 2000. While many people suspect the answer is the self-limiting communistic dogma that software has to be free, the truth is far more complex:

A serious examination of Linux will reveal that much of it is built from a hodge-podge of incompatible “scripting languages” rather than real programming languages; this naturally results in sluggish performance and the unpredictability of a bucking-bronco. But what is a scripting language?

Real programming languages such as C++, C# and VB.Net are serious affairs that build highly optimized code suitable for any component of an operating system. Serious products like Microsoft Word and Microsoft’s cmd.exe are built entirely using these solid, trustworthy tools.

On the other hand scripting languages such as “python”, “perl” and “ruby” are built as educational toys or pranks. While they have a place in the hobbyists toolbox, and as lessons in what future language designers should avoid their slow execution and costly memory overhead make them unsuitable for any important or business critical task.

The serious programming languages are noteworthy for their long-lasting appeal: VB.Net is as stable, flexible and easy to learn as the original Visual Basic released almost 15 years ago. On the other hand, new-kid Python is the latest craze amongst open-sourcers despite only having reached version 2.5! The Python language is notorious fror it’s frequently changing, incomprehensible syntax - it’s virtually impossible to make a program that runs in any consistent way for a period of time.

Astonishingly the Linuxers have yet to realize this - many components of Ubuntu and Redhat (two somewhat popular kinds of Linux Kernel) use Python for their package updater - see our previous Linux 8.04 review for just how bad this experience was!

Ultimately, if these Linuxes ever want to grow up and be ready for the world of business they will need to abandon these development fads and embrace what is tried, tested and true. This year Python is the fashonable language, but next year the freetards might decide that Perl is “in” again… and then what next? How can any serious power-user keep up with these rapidly changing bizarrely named tool-chains? The answer is that they will be avoided.

Jimmy G

Keep Reading STR.com for up to the minute technical news & insights.

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Y’all probably know that I ain’t no big fan of Judaism. Most of them jews are involved in pornography, as our good friend Tony Zirkle recently revealed, but from time to time a decent Jew comes along and tells the truth.

One of those honest Jews is Ben Stein. This fine upstanding man has created a shocking testament of suppression of free speech and persecution of Religion.

Thinking folks know that darwinism is a bunch of crap. I ain’t no monkey and I ain’t related to no monkey. I don’t swing from tree to tree and I rarely eat a banana. The notion that my grand grandfather was a monkey is preposterous. God created me in His image. PERIOD.

Please make sure you go watch the movie “Expelled“. It’s gonna open your eyes. Make sure you bring your children as this will be a wonderful foundation deeper into the subject of Intelligent Design.

I am very confident that this movie will be the death blow to the fake construct called “Evolution” and “Darwinism”.

Thanks for reading,
Shelley N. Goodman

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As we all know, the weather is exclusively the domain of God. When he is angry he sends thunder and lighting to smite sinners (as he did in New Orleans). When he is happy he sends clement weather (such as we enjoyed during the Reagan Presidency).

The wages of sin are destruction: The Holy Bible assures us that sinners and evil people will be utterly destroyed. If it were not for the good Christian conservatives God would have destroyed America years ago - your prayers are needed to save America from the sodomites!

What are we to make of this highly irresponsible experiment lead by French “scientist” - a Frenchman who like all French cheese-eaters arrogantly presumes that he knows better than God - somebody who presumes to know better than American Christians and Patriots how to spend our tax dollars.

In New Mexico, U.S., scientists tested a new ultra-high-power laser which provoked lightning. Scientists fired ultra-fast pulses from an extremely powerful laser (shown above) thus sending several terawatts into the clouds to call down electrical discharges in storm clouds over the region.

In case this kind of technobabble isnt your sort of thing - this isolent garlic muncher spent a millions of dollars (which could have helped our war on terror) shooting laser beams at clouds to make lightning. What right has man got to make lighting? God’s lightning! Listen to the frenchman boast:

“This is the first laser that has terawatt power and is also mobile,” outlined Andr? Mysyrowicz, a researcher working at the Ecole Nationale Superieure de Techniques Avancees, Paris, France. He was one of the participants in the latest outdoor tests

Who the heck does this Frenchie think he is, just because he went to “Ecole Superieure” - I got my diploma from Patriot Bible University. We didn’t study lasers but I can still see that this guy is talking crap!

Man has no right to play God. Whenever Man exceeds his authority such as by performing abortions or being gay God gets angry. And if God is getting angry then so should we. We should get angry any time God is angry because we are his flock, his servants whose job it is to ensure that his Holy will is done on Earth.

We need to stop these French atheists making the LORD angry before it’s too late - before we are judged with another 9/11 or hurricane Katrina. Please join is in condemnation of this unspeakable violation of God’s law.

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Question: Which is the most environmentally friendly car out of a Prius or a Hummer? If you guessed the Toyota Prius then not only are you a deranged America-hating liberal but you are also completely wrong: A new study from CNW Marketing Research has finally debunked the myth that these foreign-made electric toy-cars are environmentally friendly at all.

Prius drivers - you might already be a murderer - your car contains enough nickel to kill an average sized horse. How do you know that your pretty new electric car is not leaking hazardous chemicals? YOU DON’T!

According to derange eco-activist scare-monger Al Gore we should all drive the battery-powered jap-crap electric cars in preference to American made vehicles: He argues that because these cars run on nothing but electricity they do not pollute the environment. What Al Gore fails to mention is that the Prius uses batteries made out of ultra-toxic Nickel as it’s fuel.

Nickel (Chemical symbol Sn) is one of the most harmful substances known to man - it was created shortly after the fall of man (when Adam and Eve were expelled from the Garden of Eden) and is in the same chemical group as deadly Polonium, the chemical that Russian spies used to poison their enemies. The Sony laptops that bust into flame in 2006 were also fueled by guess what chemical… that’s right: Nickel.

Handle with extreme caution: This laboratory worker keeps her gloves on while handling this sample of pure Nickel. The consequences of accidentally swallowing one of these “containment pellets” would be an excruciating death.

Nickel is bad news - unlike harmless chemicals like gasoline or diesel which when burnt are converted into harmless carbon-monoxide and water Nickel cannot be destroyed other than bombarding it with high-energy radiation. In practice most Nickel cannot be recycled - the battries will be left to rust at which time the dangerous Nickel can escape into the atmosphere creating a deadly cloud of death. Anybdy who inhales Nickel gas has a 99% chance of suffering a fatal Nickel overdose for which there is no known cure.

My Hummer by comparison can be made to run on 100% nartural “bio-deisel” - a carbon-neutral fuel made in America by hard-working American farmers. It contains absolutely no Nickel at all, which means I can drive it safe in the knowledge that unlike Al Gore, George Clooney and all the other eco-doomsayers I am supporting American industry and helping the environment.

Action Alert: Are you the victim of Nickel Poisioning? Did you ever drive a Toyota Prius? Contact STR.com’s emergency prayer team immediatly. Only the power of prayer can help cure you from your incurable condition.

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Did you read last week’s big IT news: According to many of our sources, Sun Microsystems has bought a little known database maker called MySQL. You might not have heard of this company, but it’s product is very popular amongst the Linux community where it was the number one choice for people who choose their technology based on ideology rather than technical features.

The old MySQL logo, designed by the same Linux freaks who gave the world that fat penguin. Once the Sun take-over is complete I doubt we will be seeing much of this dolphin, he will be replaced by Sun’s familiar logo.

Many of our readers are wondering what this corporate power-play means for American business: The answer is that it will not have a significant impact simply because most companies who took time to evaluate which database product to use might have identified the potential threat to business of adopting an open source technology.

According to the Linux fan community, MySQL has a reputation for speed and reliability, however our attempt to independently verify these claims did not confirm what the open-sourcers believe. Within minutes of installing MySQL server on my Windows Vista workstation I experienced a complete system crash. According to Microsoft’s technical support, this crash would almost certainly not have occurred had I been using their SQL server product.

Dolphins harpooned to be eaten as meat - a sight not unfamiliar to residents of savage nations. There are some who claim that certain species of dolphin may become extinct… What does this remind you of?

It seems that this threat has come true; MySQL were once considered a mainstay of the ?Open Source? software movement. They took pride in bundling their software with almost any Linux operating system that was willing to sign-up to their viral GPL license. According to leading industry analysts these caring-sharing days are soon to end as Sun will be looking to monetize their somewhat questionable investment.

MySQL lacks many of the enterprise features of rival database products like Oracle, and Microsoft’s industry standard SQL server. MySQL is seen by most IT professionals as a poor man’s choice on account of the fact that it does not include a modern graphical user-interface (commands must be typed in via an obsolete command kernel). The image above shows MySQL running on a mac - it’s not very impressive is it?

These days businesses have modern tools such as Microsoft Access. Why on earth would anybody prefer MySQL?

Most industry analysts predict that Sun’s MySQL grab will prevent future releases of their product on Linux, Mac and Windows. It’s a giant bait and switch campaign in which customers who got hooked in my MySQL’s summer-of-love free for all, suddenly find themselves with a big bill to pay and nowhere to run:

Customers who wish to continue using MySQL will need to switch to Sun’s expensive hardware and software if they wish to continue operations. It is somewhat questionable how much profit this highwayman strategy will yield. Sun’s operating system is based on UNIX, invented by the SCO Group. Unfortunately, even SCO have been forced to admit that customers no longer want UNIX.

Also, it’s worth pointing out that MySQL is the M in ‘LAMP’ the somewhat popular open-source alternative to Microsoft’s ASP.Net. This could herald the break-up of the once happy LAMP family as giant corporations hurry to strip the assets from this once promising application stack. MySQL are the first to go… what about Perl (the P in LAMP).

Smart businesses will do what Shelley The Republican does: Keep it 100% Windows and keep buying American. It’s the only way to survive in these turbulent times.

Jimmy

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Dear Friends

The current auto-landscape very much reflects the spirit of the nation who produces the cars. Look at America for example. Proud American brands like Chrysler, General Motors and Ford building cars that are comfortable, big and just make you think: It’s good to be an American!

My former employee Tristan Shuddery once said: “Everything worth owning has been either invented or developed in the USA.” This rings especially true when it comes to cars. Lets take a look at the insignificant rest of the world: They stole a term invented by Apple Inc. which is “Nano” and basically means “Small” or “Tiny” and use it to market their cars! I am talking about the so called “Nano Effect”, the obsession to make everything as small as possible.

This is the latest models of the France based “Smart Motor Company”. It will be called “Forfour”. With 22 hp and a top speed of just over 55 Mph this will be their top of the line model. How pathetic!

Why is it that safety and comfort don’t count to Europeans? The simple answer is: They can’t afford it no more! They refused for years to adopt the American business models of free enterprise and therefore their economy is going down the crapper! It also doesn’t help that they let millions of towelheads into their countries that loot the welfare offices.

I admit, the 2008 Tata is a big improvement over…

… transporting the family on a “Scooter” …

… But can you imagine driving this “car” from New York to Atlanta with the kids in the backseat? Oh Lord, how good it is to be an American!

Some people say that the German car models we know are not even sold in Germany any more. The average Porsche you know, or the Audi or the Mercedes are only built for the US-market, in Germland however, they have their “Nano-style” models.

The new Nano-Porsche looks like a lot of fun but how about a crash with a real car? You won’t survive that, even if you have Jesus with you!

Let’s all get down on our knees and thank the Lord and the Leader for keeping the American economy strong and the American spirit vibrant, so we don’t have to suffer the “Nano-effect”. We in America still enjoy all the comfort and luxury we can buy, because God wants us to!

This is the Goodman family car and this is the car Jesus drives up in Heaven. A 2007 Cadillac Escalade. All-Wheel Drive Starting at $59,390 - 6.2L Vortec V8 VVT with 403hp, Hydra-Matic 6-speed automatic transmission with Driver Shift Control - Full-Time All-Wheel Drive, StabiliTrak electronic stability control system with rollover mitigation, Road-Sensing Suspension, Ultrasonic Rear Parking Assist - Bose? 5.1 Cabin Surround? Sound System, tri-zone climate control and more.

With this great car you can do 100 Mph and hit a Smart Car and not even notice it!
God bless America!

Thanks for reading!

Shelley N. Goodman

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Folks,
we at ShelleyTheRepublican said it all along: Linux is utterly un-American, linux is harmful to our society, it’s unsafe and it’s basically just Russian spyware! No true American will ever even consider using anything else then the good old Windows!

I just recently found out that there is actually a Satanic edition of the Linux game called: “Ubuntu”.

Check out the video:

I have tried to download and install this game on my Windows Vista but it didn’t work. I downloaded 4.3GB of junkware for nothing.

Unnamed sources though say that the goal in this Ubuntu game is to hunt and kill Christians.

This has to stop. As much as I really dislike my former employee Tristan J. Shuddery (may he rest in peace), he was right about the dangers of Linux.

Thanks for reading,
Shelley N. Goodman

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Friends,

One of the very first predictions that ShelleyTheRepublican made was that we would win the Intelligent Design argument: Not only would we win but the big idea of Intelligent Design might turn out to be a revolutionary idea that changes the way we look at the whole of science.

That is why we are proud to announce the publication of what we believe will be an important reference text for home-schoolers and kids who want to learn about God’s creation. This is the very first in a series of school books which have been paid for by ShelleyTheRepublican from the money you, dear readers, have generously donated.

Like my close friend Mike Gene, I’ve long argued that creation happened for a purpose: Complex animals like Cats and Zebras did not just arrive for the heck of it ? they have been put here deliberately by God. The leading blogger from Bill Dembski’s site Overwhelming Evidenc, Quntilis argues that as with life, many structures found in nature are irreducibly complex. I’d like to see the geologists argue their way out of that!

But what of the rocks beneath our feet? If you ask a geologist he will tell you that it’s all the result of blind physical processes following the natural laws of the universe. He’d tell you that the Earth is billions of years old and that God had nothing at all to do with it. This preposterous theory has held sway for the last two hundred years ? but recently a rival theory is threatening to change the whole of Geology: Intelligent Design.

Evolutionists believe that everything in the world is random, purposeless and pointless. If what evolutionists believe is true then we might expect this preposterous vision to be an every-day occurrence; Interestingly enough this great fish was most likely “beached” in the desert by the receding waters of the great flood.

Think about it ? if the animals and plants of the world are intelligently designed then God must have thought about where he put them: For example he did not put whales in the desert or tigers in the Arctic. Instead he designed a perfect environment for every creature under the sun. It’s obvious then that the environment, which is essential to every living thing must also have been designed.

Download The audio

Please listen to this important episode of Crosstalk for more information about the important science of Creationism, this episode features a review of the new STR.com sponsored textbook for home-schoolers, Geology By Design.

Now why don’t you hear simple logic like that in Geology text-books? The answer is because they are written by biblically ignorant Godless men who are locked into an anti-Jesus agenda. The whole of modern Geology needs to be rejected in order to bring in a new science based on Biblically accurate principles.

The Holy Bible refers to over forty different minerals, rocks, metals or alloys. That’s proof that God doesn’t just care about animals and people - he loves rocks and minerals as well. Together we can learn about all the minerals that God created approximately six thousand years ago in the book we call Genesis.

Together we can bring Jesus back into the science of Geology where he truly belongs.

Jimmy Goddard

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Friends,

Are you as concerned as I about a brand-new technology called “WiFi” which might already be harming our kids. Instead of using traditional cables and telephone lines, WiFi, puts the Internet into radio-signals beamed far above our heads, but what happens when something goes wrong?

A Wi-Fi base-station is more-usually called an ‘airport’, the first ever Airport was made by Apple computer because they needed a more effective method of distributing liberal pro-abortion videos around their Cupertino campus. According to leading scientists, having an Airport in your home could expose your children to harmful radiation.

If you stand too close to a WiFi transmitter, instead of bouncing harmlessly off the stratosphere, the signal can go directly through you, a hazard completely undocumented and denied by WiFi manufacturers. This radiation can be almost entirely eliminatd by placing the Airport in a fully-enclosing lead box, however after countless hours of searching for this sensible safety device, we have yet to find a single retailer brave enough to stock this product. Perhaps this is an opportunity for the rapidly-expanding Christian-retail sector to exploit?

Even if you manage to shield yourself from the dangerous WiFi radiation, leading family groups are becoming concerned that WiFi has no content filtering standard. A WiFi connection literally imposes no restrictions on what kids are allowed to download.

Case in point, the new OLPC - a communist vision of WiFi enabled computing came without any content filtering. As a result, the African children who were to be the first unlucky recipients of these computers soon found them overwhelmed by porn and viruses.

When African evangelicals called to ask what to do with OLPC laptops which have been corrupted by pornography, my simple advice was to burn every affected device, plus any that may have been within WiFi - range of infected machines. I explained that porn is like a virus and WiFi provides unlimited means of infection. Sadly the children are now without their laptops, but on the positive side, none of them will ever again be subjected to the temptation of an unfiltered WiFi connection.

Since these computers were too underpowered to run a modern operating system, they had no choice but to but to burn these hazardous machines and wait until Jesus saw fit to give them enough money to afford a full-sized computer running the state-of-the-art Windows Vista.

Jack Thompson, a leading expert in video-game violence and pornography: He has fought and won many battles against the liberal media who are desperate to corrupt your children with obscene games like “Hot Coffee”. Today he is helping concerned parents fight against the WiFi menace, which sneaky video-game manufacturers have put into games-consoles and even toys!

To find out more about this troubling technology, I asked Jack Thompson, a senior fellow of the STR institute, and one of America’s leading campaigners for family morality: Thompson invited me to his “crime-lab” where he would put on a demonstration:

I asked Jack to outline a worst-case scenario - just how dangerous could this WiFi be? The results were shocking: He demonstrated a normal looking Windows laptop, however one which secretly had been equipped with an Airport-Extreme chip. Jack explained that it was not possible to remove the WiFi from this laptop because it has been built into the computer’s mother-board.

Next he carefully switched on an ‘airport’: He explained that in certain cities one would not even need to switch such a device on, because their incredible 50 mile range would ensure that just about every kid in America was in range of one of these evil devices without parental knowledge.

Once the private domain of sinister closet-dwelling liberals, the growth of WiFi means that they can bring their obscene pornography into any location. This liberalwas caught teaching children how to surf for porn in a high-school playground.

Finally, he demonstrated that with a few simple key-presses and mouse clicks he had managed to connect the laptop to some kind of gay-porn server. Within minutes he had downloaded what appears to be hours of disgusting hard-core homosexual pornography. I was almost sick over the laptop, watching the sodomites guarantee their place in hell. Later Jack explained that as we were standing directly between the Airport and his laptop the gay-porn was actually traveling through us. Then I really was sick. And after I had cleared up, Jack and I prayed in the name of Jesus to save America from this evil.

I believe that Jack’s demonstration could not have been more persuasive: Under the Clinton government, valuable radio-frequencies were just given away to Apple for their Airports. Jack believes this is unlawful, which is why we are forced to take the FCC to court. Jack hasdiligently forwarded all of the homosexual filth-porn to the court as part of out initial filing. This is evidence that I expect will be as persuasive to the judge as it was to me.

Yours in Christ,

Tristan J. Shuddery

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Friends,

According to scientists, The French / Eurotrash “metric” system is in a state of crisis today, as scientists discovered that the weight of the “kilogram” is flip-flopping faster than John McCain at an episcopalian rally.

The Kilo - a unit with an identity crisis: This is one of the approximately 30 standard kilograms stored in a French castle. The polished metallic pellet a the center of this contraption is made of an alloy of precious metals, provided at government expense. Only in Europe would government subsidize such folly!

Since Europe converted to the metric system a few years back, this could have a grave impact on that continent’s faltering economy. Imagine a situation where customers wishing to buy some meat, or fill their car with gas literally have no idea how much their goods will cost, simply because nobody knows the exact definition of a weight.

Jesus, the humble carpenter no doubt used a ruler to measure his wood every day, however the Bible clearly states that he had no need of the metric system.

How much simpler life would be if we only adopted the standard units of weights and measures mentioned in the King James Bible? Biblical measures are authorized by God, and like God are not tied down to fickle matter. This is yet another example of how Science only really makes sense when it is rooted in the Bible.

Yours in Christ,

Tristan

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