STR † THE FREEDOM BLOG

Dear Friends,

The Bible tells us that when we do the LORDs work satan’s minions will try to challenge us. Every day Shelley recieves hundreds of troll emails just like the one we have the pleasure of publishing today. Please remember, even if this poster claims to be a christian, it is a well-known fact that atheists often prentend to be Christians in order to discredit our beliefs.

Yours in Christ, Tristan.

Dear “Shelley”,

Allow me to point out a few corrections to your webpage hosted at http://www.shelleytherepublican.com/category/education/technical/linux

“Fact File: The most skilled hackers call themselves “Script Kiddies” because they use Linux PHP scripts to do all their hacking. PHP is an obsolete programming language that was based on an ammateur implementation of Microsoft’s ASP. The iamge shows a typical hacker, he is probably trying to steal government secrets or pass confidential information on to fellow terrorists.”

This is incorrect. It is the least skilled hacker that is referred to as a Script Kiddie. Script Kiddies borrow scripts (not necessarily PHP - they can be Perl, C++, bash, etc) made by other hackers and use them > > in some sort of perverse attempt to justify their existance. They believe themselves to be better than others because they can DDOS or hack into a system using other peoples work.

“Possessing hacking tools should be a criminal offense*: This should include any software designed to circumvent other computer’s security, plus products with known relations to hacking tools. For example the Linux operating system includes DVDRIP (for pirating DVDs), SSH (for breaking into remote computers), and Telnet (an older remote hacking tool). All of these evil programs should be outlawed.”

Corrections:

- Use of DVDRIP falls under the little acknowledged “fair use” reasoning - I back up my DVDs to my PC and store the DVDs on a shelf where they are rarely used. As I am only ever using one copy at the time I am not pirating the DVDs.

- SSH is a remote administration tool, made by the same people who make OpenBSD (which I remember you praising in one of your articles….). It is used for checking on, updating, fixing, upgrading, and setting up remote servers. Some hackers attempt to gain access to a server via SSH. SSH itself is not a hacking tool. Telnet is likewise - although a much older and very insecure plaintext shell.

“Computer programs that do not include DRM and “Trusted Computing” security should be prohibited from sale in the USA. These incomplete computers present an easy target for hackers and must be phased out to make way for modern American technology. Linux computers are often provided without any anti-virus software, and often become riddled with viruses. Removing these dangerous computers would make life better for the rest of us.”

DRM will cause damage to the economy by reducing competition and driving small businesses out of business. DRM is too wide a subject to cover here - suffice it to say that it will reduce consumer freedom of choice and pave the way for a few large companies to produce expensive poor quality material.

“Firstly, let me say thank you for bringing the perils of that communist menace “Linux” to our attention. Unlike that communist manifesto, the so called “GNU Public License”

Linux is not communism. The code of Linux is free to share, but it may also be sold. Companies such as RedHat are examples of large American businesses built on selling and servicing Linux computers.

“What is a Kernel? This component is used for typing in simple commands like “dir” and “more”. Windows has a component called “cmd.exe” which serves a similar purpose but comes with better commands. Windows programmers often use a modern graphical user interface in preference to a kernel, however Linux users do not have this luxuary.”

Wrong.

A kernel is the most basic component of the operating systems. In a linux system this is referred to usually as vmlinuz or similar. Windows also uses a kernel. The prompt where a user enters commands is reffered to as the Command Shell. Windows uses the cmd.exe Command Shell.

Linux may use a variety of shells such as tcsh, ksh and bash. The latter three are far superior to cmd.exe in usability and intuitivity.

Windows’ Graphical User Interface runs on top of the kernel and provides a graphical interface. Graphical interfaces are also available for Linux.

These usually consist of a piece of software called the X Windows System (also referred to as Xorg or XFree86) on top of which a graphical interface such as GNOME or KDE runs. These graphical interfaces are as advanced or superior to Windows own interface. OpenBSD is also available with KDE or GNOME. On a Linux system the interface and kernel are seperated so that if the interface crashes the system is still stable. Windows does not enjoy this luxury.

“Fact File: What is source code? Old computer programs were distributed as source-code on magnetic tape. This is an obsolete way to distribute software that was used before the availablity of the more convenient “Binary” format. Even today, some programs (such as those written by GNU) are released as source code only. Perversely, this is to prevent the software from being used outside the fraternity of
computer hackers.”

Source code is the format in which code is originally written. This is then converted into BINARY CODE using a compiler. The binary code is usually distributed for commercial software that will be run on many similar systems (eg Microsoft Word) wheras source code allows a user to modify the code to suit their system.

A Linux user can convert a source code package into an installed binary program using four simple commands.

“If one of your friends is using Linux or may be tempted to try it show them this article. Explain that Linux is a genuine threat and that by using it they may be opening their computer to Chinese hackers.”

Anyone who knows anything about Linux will just laugh at you if you say that to them.

“Finally, remember to include Linux users in your prayers tonight. As individuals we may not be able to change people’s minds, but the Bible teaches that God can make any sinner repent.”

I missed the part where I was a sinner because I used Linux? I happen to be a Christian and you have no right to judge my faith based upon an operating system preference.

I hope you take the time to read and think about my points presented here. You are spreading lies, rumour and incorrect facts along with opinion posted as fact.

Praying for you,

David Nelson

Chemistry Student
Linux User
Christian

41 comments

Friends,

If you ask a liberal, ?Why Linux?, he will tell you ?Because it’s Free… free like Love, Freedom and Beer?. Isn’t that the philosophy that got our nation into so much trouble during the permissive years? Surprisingly the liberal minority have not yet grasped that none of the above are or ever should be free, and yet for years they tried to spread the Linux freedom myth.

Last month, the Microsoft corporation revealed that they own most, if not all of the patents in the Linix Program. This means that we have more reason than ever to doubt the Linux “Freedom” claims so as you might expect - the tricky Europeans responsible for Linux have had to plot a new strategy. Recently the Linux mafia has developed a new strategy, and it’s actually one that is starting to make sense to business: They claim that it’s more reliable.

These Europeans regretted their plans to fly budget on Air-Linux. The Linux computer which controlled the navigation system crashed, leaving the pilot flying blind. We can see the distinctive Yellow-Penguin logo which is visible, a feature that Linus Torvalds personally added to the crash-screen to make you feel good about systems failure.

?Is it true?, my clients ask, ?Is Linux more reliable than windows? Is it true that it never crashes and runs faster on a 386 than Vista does on a Pentium 4?. Well of course not ? unfortunately many people have fallen prey to yet another liberal myth, which today we at STR.com will have the pleasure of debunking.

“Honey, how come you’re home so early?”… “It’s because the store Linux computer crashed and we couldnt sell our special offers. They made us all redundant, and now we gotta go on welfare because of that Computer.” - Linux computers cause unemployment, and raise taxes!

The fact is that Linux gives the impression of reliability because it doesn’t do a whole lot. The Linux system of today is virtually unchanged from the Linux system of ten years ago, so they’ve had plenty of time to sweep their bugs under the carpet. Lacking many of the modern features of operating systems like Windows Vista, the Linuxers have no right to be smug. The fact is that their product crashes all the time.

Eastern Europeans at a computer hacker conference. They are planning what viruses should be included with the next version of Linux. Linux crashes, even for these ultra-leftist linux zealots. They tried to supress this photo for fear that it might undermine their tatcics, however STR.com is prepared to take the risk, despite death-threats from avid Linux fans.

Linux has a long way to go before it’s ready for the desktop, but a surprising number of organisations have ?experimented? with it for embedded systems. As when liberals ?experiment? with hard-drugs, the results can often be surreal, embarrassing and often life-threatening.

This may look like a typical Linux user’s desktop, however it’s actually yet another crash. How many people died as a result of this system failure? Linux developers dont care. Unlike Microsoft, they have no EULA which guarantees a high quality of service.

Europe, the spiritual home of Communism and Linux is a sorry tale of Linux addiction. A large French company, which many years ago was a credible rival to Boeing, is almost bankrupt because of Linux. Their new air-liner Isn’t selling, and doesn’t look like it will ever take off, for the simple reason that it has the non FAA Certified Linux on board. Next time you hear of an European plane that plunges into a glacier, fjord or perhaps even the Eiffel Tour ? you can bet Linux is at fault.

“Quick, Call the Cops - it’s an Emergency”… “Oh no… this Linux based telephone has crashed, and I’m going to be beaten up by terrorists”. Unfortunately this is an every day occurence in Europe thanks to their unreliable choice of operating system.

We at STR.com urge America not to believe the hype. Everybody knows that Linux is an operating system built by Russian and North Korean hackers with the backing of the islamofascist government of Iran. Are these the sort of people we can trust with our computers?

Yours in Christ,

Tristan J. Shuddery

147 comments

May, 19th 2004, Jim was just about to switch off the computer and go home when he heard violent knocking against the company’s backdoor. Who could that be? It’s after 10pm already. In anticipation of what was about to happen he was numb with fear and in less than a minute he had a bunch of scary looking men in black leather jackets in front of his desk. Their faces were ugly and marked with scars and full of hate and contempt. Of of them was dressed in a black suit and was wearing a black tie. His request was odd but his determination of getting his will was frightening.

Jim* is the founder of 4xhost.com*, a former successful Californian hosting company.
He read the STR articles about Linux and contacted us to tell his revealing story.

**********************
Shelley: Jim, thank you very much for coming up here to Iowa City for this interview. Do you still live in California?
Jim: No, I moved to Atlanta, my and my family’s life was not safe in California. I came to you because nobody else in the media want’s to touch this story. Everybody is afraid.

Shelley: Please tell us what happened that day in May 2004.
Jim: That Wednesday night my company was raided by the Russian Mafia. They didn’t steal anything. They wanted something different. This might surprise the readers of your blog. They wanted me to use Linux for my hosting services exclusively.

Shelley: Can you explain that?
Jim: I started my company on Christmas 2003. I used Windows Server 2003 on all my servers. I remember saying to William - that is the man I share my life with …

Shelley: Let me state for the records that I think homosexuality is a sin, but please go on.
Jim: Well, I disagree with you but that is not important now. Anyway, I remember telling him: “Why do all the hosting company’s use Linux only?”. It seemed very strange to me. I looked around and found that at least 90% of all hosting providers are offering Linux and only about 10% offer Windows Hosting as additional option. I actually thought I might have found a way of making money because I knew that people want Windows hosting and barely anybody is offering it. I think most, but not all serious system administrations agree with me when I say that Windows Hosting is far superior to Linux hosting. Linux doesn’t offer the possibility to run .NET or ASP applications. Another major reason for Windows hosting is the Microsoft constantly provides security updates. Let’s not fool ourselves: Both systems have security holes, but if a security hole in Linux is found you can only hope that some Linux programmer has time to fix it, maybe he might have a date or is high on drugs, in that case the security hole does not get fixed, because Linux is free so the Linux-user can not demand the security patches, the whole software is written by programmers in their spare time. With Microsoft Windows on the other hand you have people monitoring for security holes 24/7. The response time is amazing. Sometimes a security issue get’s public and even before the AP get’s the story out the security patch is already installed on most servers. But I don’t want to bore you with technical details.

Up to the day the Russian Mafia visited me, I was happily offering Windows Hosting and I was making very good money with it.

“The whole (hosting) industry is in the ice cold grip of the Russians. They lost the cold war but it’s looks like they are gonna win the cyber war.”

Shelley: Let me throw out this question, because I am not an expert by any means when it comes to internet stuff..
Jim: That is fine, go ahead.

Shelley: “Hosting company” means that private citizens sign up to get their web site hosted?
Jim: Yes sure. That’s it. But we did not only host private web sites. We already had contracts with a couple of major companies in our area. Windows hosting is especially attractive for serious professional users with high workload and applications that demand the highest stability.

Shelley: What did the Russian Mafia tell you?
Jim: They told me and I quote: “We found out that you refuse to use our software!” I thought for a brief moment this might be a stupid joke, but this guy was dead serious. He saw a slight flicker of a smile on my face. He got his knife out. He cut my hand. It hurt like hell. He screamed: “Do you think this is funny you fucking American? You will use Linux on your servers or you’ll die.” I said yes immediately. I was afraid to lose my life. After a minute after the guy put his knife away I found a little of my courage and dared to ask why he want’s me to use Linux and why he cares what I have on my servers. He just said with a stone cold face: “Let’s just say I like people to use our product.” And then he left.

Shelley: What did you do.
Jim: I installed Linux. I closed the company down for a month. I cancelled all the hosting accounts and installed Linux. A month later I opened up again with all Linux hosting.

Shelley: You just gave up? You didn’t call the police?
Jim: You would not ask me this if you know a little something about the Russian Mafia, Shelley. They are stone cold killers. They don’t hesitate to torture and kill you whenever they feel it would help them get their way.

The Russian Mafia : “They are stone cold killers.
They don?t hesitate to torture and kill you whenever they feel it would help them get their way”

Shelley: What happened then?
Jim: I am happy to say that I only saw those guys once more. One months after their first visit they came again. This time during the day. Of of them, a kind of middle eastern looking fella, was doing something with my servers. I think he checked my Linux versions.

In the coming month I did some extensive research. I was never a fan of Linux and did not know much about it, but I found some very alarming information. I read all Tristan’s articles about Linux. They are very entertaining if not always completely accurate. Basically he is correct, though: All Linux versions have huge security holes which can not be closed. They are all open in one and one direction.

Shelley: Please explain.
Jim: The Linux kernel included secret ports in stealth mode, they are always open. Most network administrators don’t even know they exist, but the Russian Mafia does. The most dangerous ports are 2727 and 8719. Because Linux does not have the TCP/IP security system Windows has, these ports are open for everybody who knows them.

Shelley: Sorry, I don’t understand.
Jim: It’s very simple actually. Imagine a house that has a secret hidden door. The owner of the house does not even know it’s there but it is and the Russian Mafia has the key. They can come in whenever they like without you knowing about it.

Shelley: That is awful. What are the consequences?
Jim: The Russian Mafia can look into every, and I mean every Linux web hosting account. They are not very interested to see what vacation pictures Joe and Sally American have on their hosting account but of course they are very interested to know what companies have on their servers. You have to understand: Today most companies have large amounts of confidential data on their hosting servers. That can be customer data files or in some cases even blueprints and plans of future developments. The Russian Mafia steals those and sells them to the highest bidder or uses them in Russia to make profit. This is a thread to the homeland of enormous proportions. It could ultimately bring the downfall of the American economy.

Shelley: What can we do about it?
Jim: Keep telling the truth. Linux is more popular then ever for two reasons. First: It is free. Americans have to learn that nothing is really free and you certainly have to pay an enormous price for Linux by giving all your personal data to the Russians. Second: The opinions of so called ‘Experts’ is highly influenced by the Russian Mafia. Everybody that publicly speaks out against Linux will be punished badly. They will usually kidnap a child or the wife or a girlfriend, if this doesn’t work they might wipe out the complete family. They don’t have any respect for life. They are cold blooded killers, mostly ex-military.
I also noticed another kind of scam: Because they have access to Linux hosting accounts they sometimes put child pornography on the server and tell the owner of the account that they can put more child porn there anytime and then they demand large sums of money. If the owner of the account refuses to pay, they upload child porn on the server and notify the FBI. The owner if the account is arrested immediately of course and will never be able to proove his innocence. They web hosting company is helpless in such cases because they have given up any control of the accounts by using Linux.

Shelley: I am shocked by what is going on in the web hosting business.
Jim: It’s very bad. The whole industry is in the ice cold grip of the Russians. They lost the cold war but it’s looks like they are gonna win the cyber war. Most people will never know about it.

The Russian Hacker Dmitry Skylarovap is guilty of crimes against American.
We at STR demand the death sentence for this criminal.

Shelley: What happened to your company?
Jim: I closed the company, changed my name and moved away. I could not handle the thought of being complicit in this dirty game.
I will be leaving America shortly. For me it is not safe here. The Russians have to many connections. They will find me sooner or later. I am worried about you, Shelley. I want you to bring out this interview on your web site but I fear for you life.

Shelley: Don’t worry about me, Jim. I am not scared. If they kill me it’s because God lets them and that only happens if God wants me up in Heaven. One last question: You mentioned you have a male life partner but you also mentioned you left California with your family. Are you talking about your parents or siblings?
Jim: I was waiting for this (chuckle). No, me and my partner are the proud parents of an adopted child. We are a happy family.

Shelley: Well, I better don’t comment on that, but I respect you for speaking out and wish you and your family a long and happy life. Is there something else you would like to say?
Jim: Yes. This goes to all American patriots: You don’t know how dangerous Linux is, but I do. Please don’t use it. You are literally giving the Russians the key to your house. Nothing if free in todays society. Don’t fool yourself by thinking you could get a complete operating system for free with no strings attached. It’s not gonna happen. Good luck America, I am gone.
****************************

Thanks for reading,
Shelley The Republican

More articles on that subject:
Cybercrimes on Fox.com / Russian Mafia Computer Worm / Russian Mafia Hacker Attack / Thread about Russian Malware / Russian Mafia Hackers on USAToday.com

* The names have been changed to protect the victims.

197 comments

Friends,

I know a few of you have been clamoring to hear whats happening in the world of computers. Now that I’ve retired I’ve got plenty of time to follow the news and report back exactly whats going on in the world of IT, and it sure isnt pretty.

Not so long ago, when this site was new, Shelly and I published an article called “Linux, a European Threat to our Computers“. It seems that the Good Lord was guiding our hands, because shortly after we published a very famous and influential Texan Congressman from the House Appropriations Committee read our research and decided to act upon it. As a result, a number of Federal Linux pork-barrel projects were told to buy American or risk having their budgets cut. Lets just say, that this year a number of important faith-based projects recieved some unexpected bonuses.

Tom Delay is an enemy of government waste, and was keen to back our Anti-Linux campaign. He is just one of many influencial Republicans who are prepared to back American technology. Why should we entrust anything less to the faith-based groups which will one day provide America’s essential services?

I like to think that this wasn’t just a victory for ShellyTheRepublican.com, but a victory for Jesus, America and most of all a victory for you, the taxpayer. So before I plunge into today’s story Shlley, Sam and I all wanted to say a big thank-you for all your support, donations and prayers. We really couldn’t have done it without you, the loyal STR.com readers, and of course our corporate sponsors.

Now speaking of great American technology, many of you will have heard that Microsoft Vista is running late. The liberal IT press are pulling their usual wise-guy act of blaimg Microsoft, saying things like Microsoft cant write computer-programs any more or Microsoft got in too deep with their Vista project. The truth is that Vista has been ready for months: It’s the Europeans who’ve forced Microsoft to deliver late.

STR Fact File: Should I upgrade to Vista now? Yes, definitely. Vista includes an all-new sercurity system called TCP/IP which will no doubt stump foreign hackers for years. A client of mine had a Linux computer which had a virus called “Fur Elise” which caused the computer to play random melodies through it’s speaker. I told him that if he upgraded to Vista the virus would be gone. Unfortunately he failed to heed my advice, and days later the PC’s cheap foreign-made CPU had completely burned out.

Some people just dont know when they are beat. Don’t you remember that there used to be a “Desktop war”… well Microsoft won it by inventing a new sort of computer called Windows XP which totally beat out the European Linux. If you don’t believe me, read this review we did a few months back.

A “state of the art” German made computer, naturally running Linux. Notice it’s “Enter the Matrix” style user-interface, and oddly configured keyboard. Obsolete IT like this is one of the reasons why Europe is so backwards compared to the rest of the world. Europe has banned Windows Vista because it will pose a competitive threat to it’s own antiquated products.

There was also a “Browser War”, and microsoft won that too with there excellent Internet Explorer. It was stable and fast and worked with all the wonderful ActiveX plugins. Once again, Europeans tried to compete with their “Mozilla”, it was slow buggy and only worked on Linux, and wouldnt let you see pictures or use VBScript. To put it bluntly, it was a crock!

Mozilla Firefox, no wonder this browser lost the “war”. Even the newest version of Mozilla (pictured above) lacks standard WWW features such as ActiveX and Microsft Secure Certificates.

Well you probably didnt know that there was a third war - it’s the computer battle where both sides are playing for keeps, only one side is cheating!

The Europeans have figured that they cannot compete on the strength of their technology, so they’ve invented new laws so that they can cheat. The European Union (Like the UN, but stinks of French garlic), has made a law that says Microsoft must pay one-million Euros a day until they strip out all the features from Vista that Linux doesnt have.

For example, Linux does not have an anti-virus utility, a disk-defragmentor or a system repair tool. That’s why Europe will not allow Vista to have these essential tools either. They are even talking about forcing Microsoft to remove Windows Media Player, a truly essential program. Without this utility, the computer would only be able to make simple beeps, and couldnt play any movies. Basically, it would be no better than Linux!

I know it sounds bizarre, but you’ve got to understand the Marxist European mindset. They dont think it’s fair for anybody to be better than anybody else. In a European running-race everybody has to finish first, or else somebody (probably the French) go on strike. It’s just impossible to do business in Europe.

Can your European Linux do this? The new Windows Vista desktop: Linux computers are still burdened with a text-mode interface, wheras Windows Vista has the latest cutting-edge design.

Our original Linux article was all about how these crazy Linuxers are becoming a threat to the American economy, but look at the damage that the Euro-crat linux obsession is doing to their own folk: They have created an environment that is hostile to business, and no longer care that innovation is being stifled. They are denying themselves the spectacular productivity gains of Windows Vista, and they shall pay for their own Godless foolishness.

Yours in Christ,

Tristan J. Shuddery
(Technology & Business Correspondant)

266 comments

Ask a liberal to define the word “hacker” and he would probably give you a rose-tinted answer. To the liberal, a hacker is a harmless tinkerer. A sort of digital wild-west outlaw whose “hacks” are merely victimless crimes, to be celebrated like a modern-day Robin-Hood. He might go so far to claim that “hacking” is a perfectly legitimate activity and therefore something that should be encouraged.

It’s unlikely that a FBI agent would agree; nor would anybody who has to commute by air, drive a car, raise a family or pay their taxes:

STR’s Fact File: According to the leading anti-hacker firm Symantec, hackers regularly cause over $20Bn damage to computer systems per year. The cost of cleaning up from a single hacker attack on a corporation is typically $5million per incident.

Hard working Americans know that computer technology underpins much of our daily life. These same computers that control our power-stations and aircraft my be the next target for a crazy liberal hacker, who might be looking to break into critical national infrastructure as a prank.

In order to be invited into one of the hacker fraternities initiates are required to perform smaller acts of sabbotage such as defacing a national web-site or breaking into military computers. Launching a nuclear missile, crashing an aircraft or causing a Chernobyl style meltdown are common hacker fantasies; to cause such massive destruction is the holy-grail of hackerdom. Hacker groups exist to cause mass-destruction, and therefore hacker knowledge should be considered a WMD and be controlled accordingly.

We at STR.com cannot claim to be as important for America as the nation’s energy supply or transport infrastrucure, but we too have been the victim of a hacker’s attack. We found this shocking, boasting confession posted in our “Free Speech Zone”:

From vexorian@gmail.com
Subj: I haxx0r3d yr sit3

Hello, I read your first article about the 1000000 clicks. After that I made a nifty script that downloaded the image you have at the bottom periodically to my server.

Between other things I got the 1000000 visit ad and well countless of others. You should have noticed that the click counter was advancing incredibly fast. Next time I read is that you made a whole story about someone who beats his wife getting the 1000000 click, well that’s impossible since I had the 1000000 pic (of course I don’t have it with your website because the script only cared about the counter not the lame blog)

It is a shame, I thought this site was a satyre blog agaisnt conservative morons, but you guys are for real, and that is why I am shutting you down. You were were too out of the line sometimes.

Vexorian

Naturally, vexorian’s scheme was detected and we were able to reset the counter, however the fact remains that this hacker was trying to steal from us, and worst of all, you the reader. He was trying to deny you the chance to win our prayers.

Disgusting hackers like Vexorian claim that “Information wants to be free”, the rationale for their repeated attacks on America. Believe it or not, many liberal hackers have used this nonsense-phrase as a defence of their actions when caught. They claim that information’s “desire” for freedom is a valid justification for hacking into government computers in order to steal secrets.

Friends, we survived this hacking attack, mainly because we took precautions. Unlike many American businesses, we had applied all the relevant Windows Service Packs, plus updated the Norton Firewall on our server. That means “vexorian” was no match for the very best in American technology.

But imagine what happens when hackers decide to interact with less prepared families, businesses and churches? Against the unprepared, a hacker attack can be devastating. That is why we are calling upon all Americans to lobby for tougher sentences against computer hackers. This is what we propose:

• Possessing hacking tools should be a criminal offense: This should include any software designed to circumvent other computer’s security, plus products with known relations to hacking tools. For example the Linux operating system includes DVDRIP (for pirating DVDs), SSH (for breaking into remote computers), and Telnet (an older remote hacking tool). All of these evil programs should be outlawed.
• Hackers who posess potentially dangerous knowledge should be detained unless they are willing to use those skills in the service of the government. These dangerous people should be regarded as human WMDs.
• Hacking offenses should be punished by a minimum five year prison sentence. We would allow a brief amnesty for deluded, self-confessed hackers like ESR to come forwards, however once the new law is in place we demand that it be implemented strictly. Only a tough penalty can tame hacker curiosity.
• Hackers who attack government systems or computers belonging to private companies that provide essential government infrastructure should be given especially harsh sentences. We should make an example of these evil people - Americans demand life imprisonment or possibly a death penalty.
• There should be an “Internet drivers license“. Anybody wishing to use the Internet should be examined on their knowledge of the Windows operating system, plus have a basic standard of morality. References from a church or local republican party officer may be required to get the license. Ex-convicts and people with lax morals should be kept from the Internet for their own good!
• Computer programs that do not include DRM and “Trusted Computing” security should be prohibited from sale in the USA. These incomplete computers present an easy target for hackers and must be phased out to make way for modern American technology. Linux computers are often provided without any anti-virus software, and often become riddled with viruses. Removing these dangerous computers would make life better for the rest of us.
• Three strikes… Finally, we know that liberal hackers have a tendancy to re-offend. We need to provide a much stronger dis-incentive to cause harm. In certain states, the penalty for a third offence is made stricter - for example even stealing a bottle of water could result in a long prison sentence for somebody who had a series of previous convictions. Hacking is a far greater crime, and accordingly hackers should expect a life-sentence if they have been convicted more than twice.

Friends, if you or your business, church of family has been affected by hacking, you will know that my modest proposals are fair and justified. Please write to your representitive demanding that they support this agenda for a hacker-free America.

Tristan J Shuddery
(Technology / Finance Correspondent for STR.com)

128 comments

Dear Tristian,

Firstly, let me say thank you for bringing the perils of that communist menace “Linux” to our attention. I for one have certainly taken your warning to heart, and have been very conscientious in reporting any communist sympathisers I find to the relevant authorities, such as the American Federal Bureau of Investigations. Having read of the excellent results your former colleagues in the Tuttle city administration achieved, I am sure the FBI will soon set things to right in this regard.

An FBI agent, poses for a happy snap after smashing Al Qaeda?s Linux-powered DVD piracy operation in the deserts of Afghanistan, simultaneously depriving the terrorists of funds, and protecting the profits of American companies
I have been contemplating what value, if any, this so called “open source” software development philosophy may have. Whilst there is no doubt that it is a very insidious, communist inspired ideology, surely some great American entrepreneur can find a way to turn the work of others to a tidy profit for themselves? Is that not, after all how Microsoft came to be the great American company it is today?

Bill and Melinda Gates ? great American entrepreneurs and philanthropists. An inspiration to all Christian Americans.
A quality, American owned “open source” operating system called “OpenBSD” has come to my attention and I would like to respectfully suggest Tristian, that it may be worthy of your endorsement. I know you are probably thinking this is radical, left wing propaganda talking, but please consider these extensively researched points before you cast judgement:

1) Only Americans, and some trusted foreigners (ie not Europeans) can contribute to OpenBSD.

Only a relatively chosen few (some 300 or so) are permitted to write the software. As in any great capitalist society, it is not what you know, but who you know that ensures fame and fortune in any truly worthwhile endeavour. Most of these contributors are of course, upstanding Christian Americans ? no crazy Swedish dictators here!

The Swedish Chef ? Sweden?s most useful contribution to the world?
2) All software is vetted by the Department of Homeland Security.

Before new software is added to OpenBSD, the American government checks each and every line of code, to keep us all free of Chinese viruses and the like. Isn?t that such a selfless act!! Why can?t other nations see the good intentions of the American government, and follow their example?

The OpenBSD logo ? a family friendly puffer fish
3) OpenBSD is very secure

The American government also incorporates its own, highly sophisticated security codes into OpenBSD. This ensures that no other government can access your computer. That goes for individual communists (or other undesiresble persons) too!

The Linux logo ? perverted penguins
4) American entrepreneurs can profit from OpenBSD!

Unlike that communist manifesto, the so called “GNU Public License”, OpenBSD has a very business friendly software license ? American entrepreneurs can, if they feel like it make small, simple additions to the already feature rich “OpenBSD” computer platform, and then protect all of their wonderful new software product as valuable, American Intellectual Property ? how great is that?

So Tristian, what do you think? Can a God-fearing, moral American in good conscience use OpenBSD for fun or profit? I would greatly appreciate your moral guidance on this matter.

Yours in Christ,
Michael.

PS. I found these photos at Shane’s Email Trivia, Jan’s Blog on Corporate Social Responsibility, The Rachel Maddow Show, OpenBSD and a very imoral web site nobody should ever look at.

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In my first article on Linux, I allerted my fellow conservatives to the liberalconspiracy that threatens our Nation’s IT Infrastructure. My next article compared the Linux and Windows operating systems, thus debunking much of the hype associated with this upstart. With this article, I would like to dispel many of the myths that surround the cult of Linux, with a view to exposing it’s real origins.

Ask any Linux hacker where Linux came from, and they will surely inform you that it was written from scratch by the Finnish programmer Linus Torvalds. They will tell you that he started by writing the “Kernel”.

Fact File: What is a Kernel? This component is used for typing in simple commands like “dir” and “more”. Windows has a component called “cmd.exe” which serves a similar purpose but comes with better commands. Windows programmers often use a modern graphical user interface in preference to a kernel, however Linux users do not have this luxuary.

According to legend Torvalds soon attracted a cult of self-confessed “hackers” who were able to further his goals. Many of these hackers are known only by their initials.

Linus Torvalds: His claims to have been the inventor of Linux have been somewhat debunked by a recent report by the Alexis De Tocqueville Institution. (photo from Wikipedia)

“RMS”: A noted “Open Source” activist. He invented the “eMac”, the only computer hacker’s word-processor compatible with Linux. His software is famous for being hard to use and inferior to modern tools like Visual Studio. (Photo: Wikipedia)

“ESR”: A close associate of Torvals. A self-confessed hacker. (Photo from http://www.catb.org)

“P.J.”: Runs the pro-Linux hate-site “Groklaw“. His true identity is a secret, known only to the inner-circle of Linux hackers. His contributions to the Linux computer program are also a secret.

We are expected to believe that the modern Linux just came about as a result of these amateur programmers, and until 2003 most technical people chose not to question these bizarre claims. Anybody familiar with the huge costs of building a modern operating system like Microsoft Windows Vista will know that this claim is somewhat unfeasible. In 2003
a company called SCO Group, the invenors of the “UNIX” operating system noticed something odd about Linux. Substantial portions of their own product called “SCO Unixware” were very similar to the published “source code” of Linux. They commissioned a major MIT study to discover if Linux was a copy of UNIX and were amazed at what they had found:

Fact File: What is source code? Old computer programs were distributed as source-code on magnetic tape. This is an obsolete way to distribute software that was used before the availablity of the more convenient “Binary” format. Even today, some programs (such as those written by GNU) are released as source code only. Perversely, this is to prevent the software from being used outside the fraternity of computer hackers.

“…we turned 3 different teams of code programmers loose on the codebases of AIX, Unix and Linux. And they came back with - independently - we had the three teams - one was a set of high-end mathematcians, rocket scientist, modeling type guys. Another team was based on standard programmer types. A third team were really spiffy on agent technology and how all of this technology was built in the first place. So the three teams came back independently and validated that there wasn’t just a little bit of code showing up inside of Linux from our Unix intellectual property base. There was actually a mountain of code showing up in there.” - Darl McBride, CEO SCO Group.

Darl, the charismatic leader of SCO Group, and a commited Christian claims that Linux hackers stole “Source Code” from his company.

SCO Group dropped a bombshell on the world of Linux. The evidence strongly suggested that this group of hackers had stolen the methods and concepts from their more advanced rival products, and worse still, major corporations had been colluding with the Linux hackers: Darl added, “Prior to IBM’s involvement, Linux was the software equivalent of a bicycle. Unix was the software equivalent of a luxury car. To make Linux acceptable to enterprise customers, it must be redesigned to become the software equivalent of a luxury car. This redesign was not technologically feasible without access to Unix code, methods and concepts.” In 2004, Forbes columnist Daniel Lyons wrote that SCO group had found a “Smoking Gun” - literally mountains of evidence that SCO’s intellectual property had been violated. But dont take his word for it, many leading tech analysts and journalists who once listed themselves as Linux admirers, have since turned their back on the beleaguered operating
system:

Maureen O’Gara, used to publish a journal called “Linuxgram”. After SCO’s damning revelations few businesses could afford to take Linux seriously. When she threatened to close down her popular journal, Linux activists working for P.J. ran a campaign of intimidation and dis-information in order to discredit the already disgruntled journalist. With friends like this, even the most ardent Linux enthusuast might be forced to think again. A leading tech analyst once a loyal IBM employee was forced to conclude: “IBM made a serious mistake in introducing Unix code into Linux without proper notification to? Or approval from SCO, which is the current, documented owner of Unix. The issue should have been fully vetted before Linux was compromised. The end result is a complex, no-holds-barred war against a much smaller company in an attempt to cover up and mitigate this mistake. In the process, the Linux community, in support of IBM, has been duped into using illegal means to attack SCO in the nastiest release of viruses the world has ever seen. The rest of us are used as cannon fodder in this virus plague.” - Rob Enderle, Principal analyst of the Enderle Group.

Rob turned away from Linux when he learnt of it’s criminality. He could in good faith continue contributing to the “Linux Community”.

Samizdat, the report by Ken Brown of AdTI. This book destroyed what little credibility Linux had left!

And if that was not enough, one of the most respected consulting organizations, The Alexis de Tocqueville Institution corroborated SCO’s allegations in their widely praised report “Samizdat”. This study proved beyond all doubt that Linux was in fact derived from a wide range other computer programs. It’s developers had re-used concepts from Unix without licensing the valuable patents: The Linux developers were stealing from American companies:

Linux hackers call Torvalds a “Dictator”, because he has based Linux on the principles originally developed by the Cuban Marxist terrorist Fidel Castro. (Photo from Wikimedia Commons)

Three years on from these shock revelations, Linux is still recovery. Linus Torvalds, who is often described as “Dictator for Life” is still in charge of this troubled program. He has finally recognized the need to clean up this mess and has ordered a complete overhaul of the Linux operating system. Meanwhile Microsoft Windows Vista is nearing completion, and is sure to be the most advanced and valuable computer program ever written. With Linux usage in decline, this could be the beginning of the end for Linux.

Most tech analysts agree that the struggle between SCO Group vs the IBM / Linux conspiracy is akin to David vs Goliath. It may be that SCO Group have already won their case, as IBM’s lawyers have prevented disclosure of many important documents that would vindicate SCO. (Pic by JAE)

If your friends or employers are considering switching to Linux, please remember the following key points:

• Linux has been developed by self-confessed hackers. Are these the people you want building your critical infrastructure?
• Linux adoption has been delayed by these troubling court-cases. Can you really afford to take a risk on this untested new product?
• Remember to make use of ADTI’s excellent “Samizdat“, a report that clearly debunks the origins of Linux.

Next week’s article: Can I get Sued for using Linux?

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Some readers of the ShelleyTheRepublican.com blog complained that my recent critique of the Linux computer program was unfair; They claimed that I was ignorant and therefore unqualified to review their product, moreover they stated that my opinions were biased therefore untrustworthy.

Shelley has given me the opportunity to defend myself; to tell you a little bit about myself and the methodologies I have used to evaluate Windows and Linux. This is also my opportunity to shoot down some of the more fanciful theories that have been proposed in response to my previous warning.

For starters my credentials; I am a former IT manager from a major city in Oklahoma. I am also vice-president of IT for our regional Prayer Team. Some years ago I’m proud to say that I graduated as a Microsoft Certified Engineer; I have a wide understanding of both technical and business computing issues. I am sure you will agree that I am exceptionally qualified to speak on this subject.

As for “bias”, I am not a “Microsoft Fan-boy”? or any of the hundreds of more offensive things I have been called. I do however admit an admiration for the company that gave us the modern computer and invented both the Internet and the world-wide web. Where would we have been without Microsoft? Perhaps typing obscure Russian commands into a barely comprehensible command-prompt on a Chinese made computer.

And as for our methods of evaluation: They are based on exactly the same bench-tests used by PC Magazine, which is the world’s most trusted IT journal. Let me share some of my recent findings:

We prepared two nearly identical machines. The windows “rig” was based on an AMD “Athlon 64 X2″? 2Ghz chip, whereas the Linux machine was based on an Intel “Pentium 4″? 2Ghz. We would have liked to test Linux on an Athlon as well, however AMD would not provide us with a Linux driver CD; In any case both of these chips were approximately equal in power because the Intel chip had has “Hyperthreading”?.

Naturally we tested the latest version of both operating systems. For Windows we chose the 2003 edition, available at almost every computer retailer in our country. Finding the latest version of Linux proved a challenge in itself:

We had been told that the newest version of RedHat Linux was version 3.0, which for a “flagship” product was surprisingly hard to find. When we did locate it, we were astonished to be told that it was “quite old” and that RedHat no longer provided any level of technical support for it.

When we opened the shrink-wrap box we were astounded to find that it contained a large set of floppy-disks. I cannot imagine what Redhat were thinking in this age of DVDs; still this would be a step up from the magnetic-tapes upon which FreeBSD is normally supplied (Free BSD is an older kind of Linux).

After a number of failures, we managed to take the tedious floppy-disk based installation to it’s conclusion. We could not have been more disappointed. The GUI seemed garish and hard to use. It was a woeful mish-mash of primary colors and clashing visual styles. We had become accustomed to Microsoft’s visual sophistication. The crude Linux desktop was a shock to our poor eyes:

Is this really the best that Linux had to offer? We decided to gloss over the superficial aspects of the interface and get down to actual usability.

The Linux installation did not include a web-browser, but according to the manual one could be “easily” installed using Linux’s RPM utility. After spending half an hour trying to decode the “man page”, we were able to install the latest version of Netscape Navigator, the new browser from Firefox.

This truly uncompelling start contrasts profoundly with the Windows installation experience. There was no need to download a web-browser for Windows (Microsoft thoughtfully decided to integrate one with their operating system), so instead we downloaded a small shareware productivity utility called “Bonzi Buddy”?.

The installation couldn’t have been simpler; The install icon appeared on my desk. All I had to do to install the program was double-click on it. There were no additional passwords to type in and as an additional courtesy to users, Windows installers often include extra programs that might be of interest.

For example, my download included Claria, and Comet-Cursor. A review of these utilities is outside the scope of this article, nonetheless it was gratifying that the makers of Windows software have the freedom to innovate.

The same could not be said for Linux. In the time that it took me to install three great utilities, I had barely managed a single Linux installation. Had it not occurred to the makers of Linux that their users might wish to use the Internet? Installation of some basic software required a complex series of commands and passwords to be entered.

Now what can we say of the Windows browsing experience? Many of you will be familiar with Internet explorer. Millions of Americans have grown accustomed to it’s ease of use, slick presentation and universal compatibility;

But what about Netscape?

The experience as you can see was somewhat surreal: Images appeared jumbled fonts were bizarrely out of proportion and the vast majority of websites simply failed to load. I imagine this is how pot-heads must see the world; I suspect that only a pot-head would assume that this is how the rest of the world is supposed to appear!

As expected, this browser lacked many of the basic features that Microsoft’s users take for granted. For example, it was incompatible with “Active X”, an exciting technology from Microsoft that allows “plugins”? to be instantly loaded.

On Windows, these are seamlessly downloaded and installed in the background, usually without causing any interruption to the user; On Linux, a simple browser plugin apparently requires extensive knowledge of the command-shell; Once again, we asked ourselves why Linux users would be willing to put up with this?

Finally we looked at support; Access to technical information is important for any software. Microsoft offered an extensive knowledge base in addition to a commercial, “per incident” based support line. While the support was friendly and expert we felt no need to consult Microsoft. On the other hand, Redhat’s product was baffling from the start.

Lacking any official support channel, we turned to something called ?IRC?? for help. Lacking offices, or immigration visas, many Linux developers often use IRC as a means of communication. We were quite baffled as to how anybody might expect to get any assistance at all, the whole IRC experience resembled a sordid on-line brothel:

We soon gave up expecting to find any help at all; I expect that this is what any Linux user who is not fluent in C++ will have to do eventually.

In conclusion; the much hyped combination of Linux and Mozilla’s “Netscape Navigator” does not measure up to Microsoft’s latest offering. While I feel Linux might be applicable to certain niche applications, I for one couldn’t think what that application might be. It certainly is not yet ready for the desktop.

I should hope that dispels some of the more fanciful notions about Linux’s worth to a corporation; It’s an absurd to suggest that great companies like Google and IBM might have had anything at all to do with this mess.

Of course, this review is somewhat incomplete; Linux is defficient in many more ways; For example it does not feature something called Digital Rights Management; It certainly seems that Linux users have chosen to become a 2nd class citizen compared to users of more mainstream operating systems; That too is outside the scope of this review, but please be reassured that we will return to it soon enough.

God Bless You,
Tristan

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*Update:** This problem is now fixed, this website is now hosted on Windows 2003. I feel a lot better already!
Friends
People who know me can confirm that I am the last person that would not admit a mistake I made.
Therefore: I told you all that this website is not hosted on Linux and that was dishonest. But in my defense: I did not know any better, because my webmaster told me I was hosted on a solid Windows operating system. Now that I found out the truth I, of course, cancelled my webhosting and fired the webmaster immediately and signed up for REAL WINDOWS HOSTING! I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me, since many of you probably never would have visited this website if known that it was actually Linux hosted.
Just to let you know my friends, in the next days the website might be offline on an hourly basis but I am sure you might find that the website will be much better hosted in the future: Faster, more secure and first of all, I am not contributing to this strange Russian operation system called ‘Linux’.
God bless and if the website might be down don’t forget your friend Shelley and come back soon!
Yours,
ShelleyTheRepublican.com

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Those of us who try our best to follow Jesus Christ’s example are always conscious that we too may be persecuted; It is always the way ? those who dare to bear witness often fall prey to the forces of evil. Forces of evil that are every bit as real today as when Christ walked the Earth.
I became conscious of this fact shortly after posting a sobering report on some disturbing trends in the IT market. This site became the victim of two of the web’s worst gutter-dwelling persecution sites. For daring to follow Christ’s example a horde of rude and disruptive liberals attacked this blog and made offensive remarks about myself, Shelley and Mark.
A long list of mainly French and German blogs posted crazy, but fortunately incomprehensible remarks about my article; If only I could be bothered to learn to read your dead languages, I might actually care what you said! Fortunately I cannot read French or German.

?

We are not the first blog to have become victims of Lunix user’s mob-mentality, but we are not going down so easily.
We are determined to keep publishing despite the hundreds of visitors who would wish to silence us. We are writing for the silent Republican majority whose voice has traditionally been suppressed under the crushing weight of Liberal media.
Furthermore, I intend to expose the corruption and malicious intent behind the two web-sites that cheerfully send their goons to disrupt our sober and reflective discussion.

We are not the first blog to have become victims of Lunix user’s mob-mentality, but we are not going down so easily.We are determined to keep publishing despite the hundreds of visitors who would wish to silence us. We are writing for the silent Republican majority whose voice has traditionally been suppressed under the crushing weight of Liberal media.Furthermore, I intend to expose the corruption and malicious intent behind the two web-sites that cheerfully send their goons to disrupt our sober and reflective discussion.

Digg.com: http://digg.com/linux_unix/Linux_-_European_threat_to_US_world_domination

You may not have heard of this web-site, however it is the most popular co-ordination center for illegal left-wing vigilantism. Despite being owned by an American company, it’s users overwhelmingly consist of European hackers who have a grudge against American business and morals.
Digg.com is a popular place for Internet-mobs to meet; You can think of this as the online equivalent of soccer-hooliganism; a barbaric practice that still remains popular in much of Europe. Users of this site take turns voting on which site they will hack next.
TheInquirer.net
Whilst this site is of concern to any decent minded webmaster; I am more worried by a British news-site called “The Inquirer”; Anybody who works in the computer industry will recognize this publication; It’s distinctive red-top confirms it’s association with Marxist traditions of journalism.
Since The Inquirer was founded; it’s mission statement has always been to provide misleading left-wing propaganda with a view to causing harm to the American IT industry.
They never have a single nice thing to say about American products; and everything they publish is written with a disgusting Limey sneer. I suppose you could call them “Activist Journalists”, but that would be too high-praise for this site; I am sure they make it all up as no manufacturer with any sense would be willing to talk to their operatives.
So now you know who are sending these illiterate, godless mobs to harass us. Our old enemies, the Marxists and the Democrats who in turn are being led by their traditional puppet-masters the British. These are the people who want you to stop reading Shelley’s site.
But I have news for you crazy Europeans; This is America, land of free-speech ? and no matter how many Linux hackers try to shut down our site, we intend to keep telling the truth no matter what it takes. As Christ is our example, this is what we promise!

(Article by Tristan)

69 comments